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Thread: if you have a few minutes to spare... (long)

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    if you have a few minutes to spare... (long) 
    #1
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    the setting:
    Sitting on the floor in my closet trying to scrape up approximately a half gram of coke into a fold (made from a Revlon Colorsticks ad) for safe keeping until the next time we decide to do it. The following moments will motivate me to wash $40 down the drain and two days later, throw away our bullet containing another quarter gram of coke into an outdoor trash can on my daily lunchtime run. Yes, I went jogging with a bullet of coke in my fist.
    Now, on with the story...
    In My Closet on 01.21.02
    "Fuck this SHIT."
    (laughing in realization like when I discovered the truth behind the Catholic religion)
    Okay.
    So we did it AGAIN this weekend
    It’s only been a handful of times
    Since 2002 began
    Three weeks ago
    We hosted the party of the year (so what if it’s only January 21st)
    Gave half of Denver
    A night to remember
    And gave our friend and roommate a goodbye
    Wrapped up in the walls of this place
    And in the arms and smiling faces
    Of best friends and strangers
    This place
    Where we shared so many fun times
    That didn’t leave white flaky messes.
    I stop and think about who I am
    When I’m on it
    When I’m off it
    When I’m chopping lines in our kitchen at 8am
    To feed our habits
    I must look like a rock star
    Or a total fool
    Or the girl who everyone wants to be sitting next to
    And then I think about the girl
    Who likes chopping veggies in the morning
    For your egg white omelets
    To feed our bellies
    And look like a nurturer – who I want to be
    And have you sit next to me
    So that I can feed you the world.
    It’s true every new occasion overshadows
    The previous bender
    But this time
    THIS time
    THIS TIME...
    We’ll let this one be the most spectacular one of all
    The one where we attempted to go out in public
    Only to be shut out by bowlers with Downs Syndrome
    (truth be told, they looked better than we did)
    The one where we had to call in Arm & Hammer, Reynolds, and Charmin
    And actually had to phone a friend for the correct measurements
    To give us one final wave of euphoria
    The one where yet another time we could
    Exhale in relief and thank heavens
    No cops
    No fights
    No overdoses
    No pukers
    Although that one corner in the living room did smell like urine.
    Let this one be the one that we remember
    As the one that was so many things
    That we won’t even try to top it.
    The one where we wound up again
    In our love nest
    And tried to order porn
    And successfully indulged in it
    After a solid 30 minutes
    Of technical difficulty
    And the sex we swam in shortly thereafter
    Was perfectly timed
    Even two sober people
    Couldn’t have come harder
    Couldn’t have felt so alive
    But we’ll try our best
    And in the minutes following
    This monumental frolic
    Well, the word precious
    Was designed for just that space of time.
    And from where I am right now
    On this very floor
    I can still see you in the doorway
    Of my closet
    Admiring my body and telling me I’m beautiful
    As I change into my Elements shirt
    And lowrider Hurley’s
    That you bought for me
    Your "favorite scrubby outfit of mine"
    You ask yourself
    How’d you ever get a girl like me?
    And the way you looked
    When you spoke those things
    I sometimes wonder if it’s possible
    For you to top the things you say
    And more than that…
    How was it ever possible
    For me to get
    A boy like you?
    And then a few hours later
    You say this other thing
    This thing which defines that word
    Precious.
    It’ll cause me to do unthinkable things
    This thing
    It’ll even change other things
    Which thankfully won’t even happen, now.
    It’ll make us the most dazzling people
    We know
    We will be the cool ones
    Who we are
    Who enjoy each other
    And everyone else
    Substance free
    This thing you said
    It speaks to me
    And these words
    They dance inside of me
    And here’s what you said
    (my head plays it over and over and over)
    "I’d much rather hang out with my girlfriend –
    Sober".
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    #2
    Bluelighter
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    Unbelievable...honestly, I haven't read anything this good in a long time.
    I know this was just one tiny element of your piece, but it really struck me:
    When Iím chopping lines in our kitchen at 8am
    To feed our habits
    I must look like a rock star
    Or a total fool
    Or the girl who everyone wants to be sitting next to
    And then I think about the girl
    Who likes chopping veggies in the morning
    One of the things that fascinates me about drugs is this strange, hard to reconcile dichotomy that you've captured so perfectly right here.
    Thanks for posting this
    Last edited by PsychoKitten; 04-01-2004 at 11:53.
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    #3
    Star
    And to think the other day I was thinking "Where is Mini?"
    This is a great piece. You balance everything so well in your writing. Fabulous.
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    #4
    Bluelighter ice-9's Avatar
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    Thumbs up
    dayum.
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    #5
    Bluelighter yoUr bLiSS's Avatar
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    ms. mini you are amazing...this was amazing...
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    #6
    Bluelighter Sweetpea's Avatar
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    That's what I love about your writing-so much heart in it. I saw you as nuturing by the way
    You shine together.
    Legs straddled around him, or singing 80's songs
    Viva la Mini y Steve
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    #7
    Star
    And in the minutes following
    This monumental frolic
    Well, the word precious
    Was designed for just that space of time.
    girlie, as always, you just left me in awe.
    I fell, once again, into what was becoming a very familiar k-hole,
    And at the same time, there he was falling,
    Falling for a girl who could never conceive of loving him back
    I used to pride myself on being this sophisticated school-girl,
    Who hit the books by day and danced with lines of white at night...
    We all know how that goes,
    The glass tables smudged with powder,
    The razors gleaming on a plate nearby
    Half a straw cut to a more manageable size
    It all sat there like this vivid reminder,
    Of the drug-crazed anti-princess she was at night,
    And there you continue to sit,
    Gazing at me from your tunnel-vision world
    Thinking i'm just about the most beautiful creature you've ever seen,
    But tomorrow, i'll be just another memory you scraped off a plate,
    Inhaled,
    And drifted off to make sweet love to
    in some fantasyland
    ahh, drugs. thanks for capturing another REAL moment, MiNi. continue to captivate us... i missed ya.
    Last edited by PsychoKitten; 04-01-2004 at 11:55.
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    #8
    Bluelighter L O V E L I F E's Avatar
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    Truly inspirational.
    You amaze me.
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    #9
    Ex-Bluelighter Furnace's Avatar
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    Remember in the beginning of "The Empire Strikes Back?" That ice planet, Hoth? They filmed the scenes in the city I live in
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    I'm in total awe.
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    #10
    Bluelighter
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    HUGZ.
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    #11
    Bluelighter
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    u r gud.
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    #12
    Peace
    simply amazing....I usually get about half way through long peices and then lose interest(my attention span isnt the greatest these days) but you kept me captivated all the way through.absolutely loved it
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    #13
    Bluelighter
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    Ninja
    *sighs happily*
    Nice work, I love reading this kinda poetry when I'm at work and the day is dragging along...
    Thanks Mini
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    #14
    Bluelighter Angelight's Avatar
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    truly, honestly...amazing.
    thank you
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    #15
    Heart
    you all made me smile.
    see --->
    ~thank you~
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    #16
    Heart
    When I'm chopping lines in our kitchen at 8am
    To feed our habits
    I must look like a rock star
    Or a total fool
    Or the girl who everyone wants to be sitting next to
    how did i miss this...anyhow, this is really good, and...the above quote sounds like something i have thought before.
    thank you.
    Last edited by PsychoKitten; 04-01-2004 at 11:58.
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    #17
    Bluelighter
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    Very happy I decided to read this. Amazing
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    #18
    Senior Moderator
    Electronic Music Discussion
    Noodle's Avatar
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    I wish good journeys to both of you, together.
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    #19
    Bluelighter Aja909's Avatar
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    Thumbs up
    :rinting::
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    #20
    Bluelight Crew dr seuss's Avatar
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    Wink
    ::amazing::
    thank you
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    #21
    Thumbs up
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    #22
    Bluelight Crew up all night's Avatar
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    This poem is alive.
    Thank you so much.
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    #23
    Bluelighter yoUr bLiSS's Avatar
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    Talking
    bump for one of my favortie cure babies!
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    #24
    Bluelighter L O V E L I F E's Avatar
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    Bump

    [ 04 February 2002: Message edited by: L O V E L I F E ]
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    #25
    Bluelighter L O V E L I F E's Avatar
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    The most beautiful thing about the love you are experiencing is that you fully appreciate it.
    I was very impressed with the MiNi I got to know in Early 2000, and am extremely proud of the person you are becoming.
    You inspire me.
    -- LL
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