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Thread: I just gave birth

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    #51
    Bluelight Crew Bomboclat's Avatar
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    Shoulda weighed the shit, IMO.
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    #52
    Bluelighter LSDMDMA&AMP's Avatar
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    YOU BROKE A TOILET WITH ONE SHIT!!!11
    epic win dawg.
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    #53
    Bluelighter Artificial Emotion's Avatar
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    You know when you've taken a really big dump and there's part of a huge log that won't come out no matter how hard you push? Is it possible to use a vacuum suction device to suck it out? That would definitely work wouldn't it?
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    #54
    I couldn't help but laugh. I thought the thread title was serious. :P
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    #55
    Bluelighter Help?!?!'s Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by chuchu View Post
    read this and puked real hard. Its INTENSELY graphic. goddamn
    My god EuporicNod you've made someone vomit from a single post. Now thats skill!
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    #56
    Bluelighter bignbrown's Avatar
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    dear god i just didd one which was the most painful thing ive ever experienced, bit worried though it was bloody as hell at the end. (nice gory details :P)
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    #57
    I just my finger bro.
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    #58
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    That's one of the funniest threads ever. I actually took it pretty serious too when I saw the title.
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    #59
    Amazing.
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    #60
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    I never used a fork but I've used my hand and some toilet paper. it didn't work, just broke pieces off but didn't pull the rest out. lol
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    #61
    Bluelighter Atlien3's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by euphoricnod View Post
    I remember there was one time when I had been binging on Methadone pretty hard I hadn't taken a dump in like a couple of weeks.

    It was so big that once it came out a little bit and then it just wouldn't come... It was awful. Then I saw a fork on the bathroom counter and after like 20-30 minutes of sitting there in pain I stuck it into what was poking out and pulled it out.

    It was HUGE. I mean like... small log huge. I was in so much pain and it bled and bled and bled.

    The solution: Fiber, lots of fiber. I use Orange flavored Metamucil when I binge. About four teaspoon worths a day.
    lmao @ a fork, it just happened to be there and u stuck ur log with a fork, hahahahaha, u cant make this shit up
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    #62
    I bled from my ass after a huge dump today... barely been doing any opiates at all heh
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    #63
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    hell man this thread is funny..this should be on the front page....and yeah ive had my fair share of dierunga shits
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    #64
    yall are full of chit.!!!
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    #65
    Bluelighter kkattastic's Avatar
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    RIGHT....if there is blood in your poop-it is coming from your ass cos the small blood vessels there are breaking from straining or you are developing an anal fissure-to get rid of this take stool softeners like lactulose or laxatives to allow your poor ass time to heal.
    I never smoke/use after 9pm then in the morning have a coffee before using-i'm not exactly rattling but i can usually have a decent shit without suffering
    if your poop is BLACK-get to a doctor quick!that is blood coming from your stomach
    manual evacuations are common in spinal units but not usually forks-more use of spoons to get the fucker out
    god bless you all
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    #66
    Greenlighter
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    I was addicted to opiates(mostly dillies) for 6,7 years so this was always a problem for me,even though I took Metamucil 3 times a day,drank tons of water,and so on and so on.I still had to stick my fingers up there on a weekly basis.Although sometimes I just couldn't get "up there" far enough so I had a special spoon I kept under the sink for the my fingers occasions and I often bled.

    Now I have been on methadone for over a year and a half or so and my bowels are still in the same condition even though I have been on the same amount for almost all that time and haven't had one slip on anything.So I still have Metamucil 3 times a day and etc.,etc.And out and up my fingers go sometimes and my pooh spoon is never far away.
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    #67
    Bluelighter LSDMDMA&AMP's Avatar
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    BAHAHAHAA
    not shitting for
    WEEKS
    HAHAHAH
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    #68
    Greenlighter Effex26's Avatar
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    I am so sorry to say I can relate to this!! I have had some horrible experiences which I would prefer not to go into tooooo much detail!
    However before I was strung out on heroin, I had the opposite problem. I used to need to go very urgently out of the blue! Doctor said it was due to my diet but I didn't give a fuck, I ate what I liked anyway becoz of this problem, ever since I have been on da gear (bout 6 years) it balanced out! I do have the odd experience as I mentioned above when I go on a bit of a binge of doing heroin for two weeks non stop but most of the time its all gravy baby. (pun not intentional)
    Who says heroin is bad?
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    #69
    Bluelighter freehugs's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by kkattastic View Post
    RIGHT....if there is blood in your poop-it is coming from your ass cos the small blood vessels there are breaking from straining or you are developing an anal fissure-to get rid of this take stool softeners like lactulose or laxatives to allow your poor ass time to heal.
    I never smoke/use after 9pm then in the morning have a coffee before using-i'm not exactly rattling but i can usually have a decent shit without suffering
    if your poop is BLACK-get to a doctor quick!that is blood coming from your stomach
    manual evacuations are common in spinal units but not usually forks-more use of spoons to get the fucker out
    god bless you all
    This made me lol
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    #70
    Quote Originally Posted by Atlien3 View Post
    lmao @ a fork, it just happened to be there and u stuck ur log with a fork, hahahahaha, u cant make this shit up
    Ace aint it? That turd must've been pretty solid to take a fork. I remember this one dealer's house I used to go to and he went to the bog and the dirty fucker was so amazed by this humungous turd that he'd just laid he said, and i quote, "I was doing a shit and it felt so big that I wrapped my hand in tissue paper and grabbed it on the way out". Then he preceeded to show us all this massive stinking club of a turd. I shit ye not.

    Dirty sod, eh?

    But in all seriousness, opiate poos can be pretty painful.
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    #71
    British people so weird. Bog? Sod? WTF?
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    #72
    Quote Originally Posted by PhrostByte View Post
    British people so weird. Bog? Sod? WTF?
    Bog is a toilet, which I presume comes from when people used to go down to the bog to shit.

    Sod is actually a clump of earth but is used as a derogatory term for someone.

    Hope that helps!
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    #73
    It does help, thanks... and yeah I kinda figured it out from the contexts clues (go 12th grade English lol).. it's still weird though. :P
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    #74
    Greenlighter n0stalgiaEst.'s Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Artificial Emotion View Post
    Not really.

    Sorry to be graphic, but I just took a shit that was so large (due to opioid constipation) that it was bloody when it came out. I was in absolute agony when I was desperately trying to squeeze it out that I couldn't help yelping like a wounded animal.

    This is happening on a regular basis and I am worried that damage is being done to my colon. Do I have anything to worry about?

    I'm currently trying lactulose. Should I just keep increasing the dose I take until it works?

    Sorry if I spoiled your dinner.
    LOL
    I know this was asked so long ago, but if anyone is having the same issue, what works WONDERS is buying some Mineral Oil from any drugstore, or Cod Liver Oil and just swiging back a tablespoon of that every other day. You will never face this issue again, and it has other health benefits such as increasing your omega 3 intake, makes your hair shiny and skin soft, helps digestion, etc. It tastes horrible and oily (no shit) so just chase it with something strong like cranberry juice or some carbonated grape drank.
    That and keep your fiber intake up (Metamucil if you're lazy.. or some good ol' daily fiber cereal) and all will be well.
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    #75
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