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Thread: Did you get fucked up at fifteen? . . . ( not really a roll call )

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    Quote Originally Posted by monkeewater View Post
    as long as u get money, do whatever the f""" u want!
    ???
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    Bluelighter solvent101's Avatar
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    wel im 16 atm but iwas geting high and drinking at 12 by 14 i was rolling quite abit and soon got well into ketamine when i was abit younger i was more of a mash head than now and had alot more older mates but they have all started to grow out of it a bit and spend more time in the pub but now im ocasional rolling if i can get good pills snif k every now and then and i went crazy last mushy season i wat to try acid and the 2cs my only halucigenic exp is mushrooms and lsa and san pedro ive found ket and nitrous is intense as fuck 2 i was rollin and keting 2gether alot id like to hear what you think youths and drugs i mean im hardly iresponsible my the best thing ive done is mushroooms and dabled with e and mushys
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    Lol... I was smoking pot at 13 and drinking beer so I'd say yeah.
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    Bluelighter phactor's Avatar
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    Just herb at that point, I think a little bit of alcohol and maybe a few pharms. 17 through 22 were when I was really really out of control
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    Bluelighter Thanatos's Avatar
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    I started smoking bud right when i turned 13 and i was drinking beer well before that time. I only smoked like once a week at that time. As long as you can keep it under control without getting too high its all gravy.
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    i've been smoking and drinking since 6th grade. im in 9th now. never been caught
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    Bluelighter Cyc's Avatar
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    I hope everyone recognizes that the originator of this thread is an absolute legend. Don't ever forget that.
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    Bluelighter thadocta13's Avatar
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    i started using at age 10. i was addicted to opiates and cocaine by age 12. :/ i'm 18 now and i regret alot of stuff i've done.
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    I started weed at 15 and now im 16 i have done x acid shrooms dxm bzp crystal
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    Wow, these stories are awesome. Just makes me feel less alone in a way. Here's what I can remember of my story...

    Age 14 I met this girl around 24 years old I'm a lesbian so is she, we both liked each other. I would drink with her. My first drinking experience ever besides sipping wine at dinner or sneaking a beer was with her, a bottle of Kahlua. I really have avoided Kahlua since because of getting so sick and I'll probably never forget that taste for my entire life. Her mom also had back problems and would get tons of Perc's and never take them. So this girl would meet me, I would bring a ZipLock sandwich bag and she would pour the majority of the bottle in my bag for free. It was her gift to me.

    I honestly can't remember how our pill meetings even became... I don't remember if she told me they were amazing... if I said I wanted to try them... I'll never know.

    This changed me forever. I would take a 1/2 then a whole, then 2 at a time. I was only doing them at night that whole time though... which I'm still proud of myself for to this day. If only I could get that self control back, ugh. I would take the Perc and sit outside and listen to music until I couldn't take the mosquito's attacking me, I then would write/sketch, and fill up notebooks. I slept very little, and I loved that calm, awake, confident, music sounds better feeling.

    Fast forward to around 16- to present 21 years old. I started taking pills from my father's medicine cabinet. He had the good, good stuff. I was not only taking them, but trading them with him since I ended up being prescribed benzos, anti-psychotics, muscle relaxers, and ADD medication from the psych doctor. I wish I could give an exact age for some of this stuff, but I honestly can't remember what age I was when I first tried some of it.

    Age 17 I started drinking heavily. I met another girl and drinking was her thing. So we would get trashed on the weekends when I stayed over her house. I would give her mom the money and she would buy it for us, and I'd give her mom money for cigs and she would buy me those too. I used to get so sick when I first started drinking, I look back now and wonder, what the fuck was I thinking?

    Even with all I was taking I still wanted more, I had a heavy Ativan, Valium addiction through college (which I need to get around to finishing). Buying Perc's and Oxy's at this point from people on campus and my friends on other campus'. In college doing large amounts of opiates and benzo's pretty much. Lots of Fentanyl. My father got the patches and he didn't like them so he would give them to me and I loved it. Actually did Fentanyl before I smoked weed. So much for that "gateway drug" bullshit.

    Somewhere in my 20's I did Ecstasy and got a piperazine instead. Haven't touched one since. My true love is opiates anyway, so I don't feel like I'm missing out on it. Knowing what I do I should have never done that pill, but I was so fucked up already and my mood was "fuck everything" so I took it and was extremely sick. I have never asked for death so many times and actually meant it. I just rode it out myself in my room and read up on here when I could focus to read. Never again though.

    All through the years my opiate use has continued, every so often I will give it a break and then pick it up again. Heroin and coke fit in there too. But the heroin didn't seem like such a big deal to me after all the Fent I did. The guy I did heroin with thought I was lying about ever having done it before because he gave me 2 bags at "least" and I wasn't nodding and didn't get sick, I was actually like hmm... I rather do my Fent. And coke was fun the first few times, but it got old at every party and quality is so hit and miss when you go to parties. I have never craved coke or tried to go crazy looking for it you know. Different story with the opiates.

    Now I'm 21 and on disability for PTSD and bi-polar, had some extremely awful shit go down, seems like life isn't letting up anytime soon. Still use drugs as that magical crutch I found years ago. I used to say I just wanted to use different things for the experience, but now it seems like I'm more than set in my ways about this... how I'm strictly opiates the past year. I am prescribed Adderall but I rarely take it anymore. I have yet to touch acid, or shrooms. Part of me used to care that I hadn't tried those things, and now I'm just content with my opiates. I don't care if I ever try them. I don't know if that means I'm getting old, or what...
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    Bluelighter amber_dawn's Avatar
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    i smoked pot and got drunk, but that was it. And rarely at that, like sometimes on weekends or occasionally after school, maybe 2-3 times a month! I was a "bad kid" too, getting in trouble at school, bad grades, dressed weird, etc.....i just wasn't that into it! Plus I was kind of a loner and didn't have much of a connection.

    I didn't start using anything else until I was 19.
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    Bluelighter hyroller's Avatar
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    haha - even though this thread is a decade old, it still bears a hell of a lot of relevance to the present day!

    I was one of those 'responsible' BLers who waited until their 20s to begin experimenting. Been through the ringer of the drug habit spectrum, and here I am, imparting my knowledge. Still!

    If we don't tell the newbies, then who will? Someone must. And it gets no less fulfilling as time goes on......
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    I smoke pot, did mushrooms, acid. and rolled once at 13...
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    I was a good kid actually. I did smoke weed until I was 18 years old.
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    I grew up around drugs, when i was 3-6 yrs oldest my brother would smoke pot around me because I always wanted to hang with him and his friends. While I dont remember it very well im sure it was vital in developing my attitude towards drugs. From about 10-13 my older brother would smoke pot around me with his friends. I was always curious to try it and couldnt wait for the day to come. Also when I was around 8 or 9 my mother got arrested for herion possesion in front of me. It made me never want to try anything hard.

    Around 13 I started smoking weed with my best friend and we loved it. I was always popular and succesful as a kid but had hidden insecruity issues that weed made disapper. I always said I wouldnt try anything unnatural. When I was 14 I tried a zanax for the first time and had my first drinks. Both were okay but I preferred to smoke pot. When I was 15 in freshman year the craziness began. For the first half of the year I didnt smoke much because of a gf but after we broke up I started blazing everyday. I also started to drink more and go to parties. I tried ectasy and acid within two weeks of each other. I also liked both alot but didnt start using them frequently till I was around 17. I never went out of control with any of my drug use and felt I was very informed about my choices and researched substances online. It gave me a confidence when using drugs.

    16 was the same shit smoking lots of weed and drinking sometimes. Other occasional drugs. I think I tried coke and vics for the first time at this age. But my drug usage was pretty steady and non abusive of anything. When I was 17 I started selling weed and zanax to make some ectra cash. I was popping zanaxs frequently. I also tried snorting and smoking oxy for the first time and I loved it. But I fell out with this friends and then started doing lots of coke. I enjoyed the blow but was never really developed an addiction for it. The crowd i was chilling with just used it alot. I layed off the coke and started doing oxy again. I loved it, everything in life was good school, money, social life. I thought I was too smart to ever get sucked into the dark side of drugs. From late 17- 19 my opiate addiction went into overdrive. I began using everyday snorting large quantities. For a long time I made it work so I was convinced I didnt have problems. My father found out and sent me to rehab. I was still convinced I didnt have problems. 9 months ago my life began to fall apart. I lost my job and just hustled all day to make money. Relationship was falling apart. I tried shooting. 7 months ago I got clean. I relapsed 3 weeks ago for a couple days.

    Now I dont regret using drugs as a young kid but it did give me a cocky attitude towards drugs. I thought I was so smart and crafty. That I could use without consequnces because it worked for so long. So to young kids who want to try using I say be smart and respect drugs. Expermintation isnt bad and can provide lots of good experinces. Remember though that drugs are powerful and devious. They will creep up on you without you seeing a thing. Be smart and safe and have fun!
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    pills,weed,coke,and dope
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    When I was 15 I was experimenting with A LOT of drugs, one day me and my friend double dropped 2 pokes, got super baked, got drunk, then I tried Meth for my first time at the end. Needless to say, fucked up with insomnia wasn't fun
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    Greenlighter
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    i first started smoking weed in the 6th grade, and started popping pills in the 8th grade so id say yes.
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    Bluelighter LSDMDMA&AMP's Avatar
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    8f grade? Tried bud then..at 15..mostly bud and some pillz. this year (about..just gonna turn 17 in a few days ) while 16 i tried rolls, acid, shrooms, speed, 2C-E, 2C-T-2, 5-meo-DMT..
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    Bluelight Crew nolys's Avatar
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    i started rolling when i was 13, by the time i was 14 id tried mdma, speed, weed, alcohol, butane , coke (when i was 15), 2-cb (i think was in one of the pills i took, not too sure though) and some codeine. Im only 17 now and that has slowed wayy down. in the past 6 months all ive did is alcohol (weekly), mephedrone (twice) and weed a couple of times.
    Ive wised up a lot and the experemental stage is pretty much over :/

    Although 13-15 were probably the most fun years ill ever have in my life, especially with the quality of mdma that was readily available
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    Greenlighter
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    Capsule
    Quote Originally Posted by flux View Post
    I've always had a little love-affair with self loathing. There have been points in my life when I've worked really hard at it, often very successfully.

    I was never a very happy little kid. My classmates were incredibly snotty, and I was never willing to compromise any of my wishes or personality "flaws" to make friends at school. Instead, I sat there, waited for the end of the day, and ignored my classmates ignoring me. Granted, if I now went to school with little-flux, Iwould probably ignore me too. I was a weird little kid, but whatever. Moving on.

    So I became kind of withdrawn. I had a few friends outside of school - but even so, I got spacey, and sad. I don't even remember much of elementary school. I remember a few key moments, and other than that I just have a vague recollection that I stared out of the window most of the time, and cried at home every day afterwards. It got better in middle school, but not much. I never really expected myself to make friends, and therefore never really tried to do it.

    I guess you would say my turning point was 8th grade (I'm going to start getting to the point....maybe ). In eighth grade I discovered how much fun hating myself could really be. And I threw all my energy into that. I hung out with loser-punk-assholes, I wore a lot of black, I cut myself, I drank, I never raised the blinds in my room. I worked very hard at being sad. I was almost proud of the sickly, empty depressed feeling I managed to maintain for nearly 2 years. A lot of it probably had to do with the fact that I stopped eating almost completely.

    I can't really tell you how that started. I can't even say if I ever even hadan eating disorder. I had the symptoms of one for about 2 years. But I've never really been sure as to how much of it was anorexia, and how much of it was me trying in a bizarro way to hate myself more than I did. I genuinely remember thinking "Hey, an anorexic would do it like this, girl. Remember how you read it? You'd better get back on track if you wanna get this thing." *Sigh* I don't understand it at all.

    Nevertheless, I did a reasonably good job at acquiring whatever parts of the disease I could. I constructed a bizarre network of weird rituals, I counted my ribs daily, I cut my food into teenytiny pieces before I would even think about putting it in my mouth....Hell, I even had a belt that I would wear tightly around my stomach. You know that full, press-on-the-pants feeling you get after Thanksgiving? My stomach pressed on my belt after only three small bites of yogurt or celery or whatever the hell I was eating. That's how I knew I was full....Bleah, I'm going off subject here.

    I did a good job. God, I shouldhave. I mean, I would stay up at night and research. I had stacks and stacks of books, and would take every case study as possible tips....In any case, by December in 8th grade, I was most definitely wasting away. I was down to about 95 pounds and would faint weekly. I had constructed the perfect empty-depressed-hole for myself and I loved it.

    Somehow I got out of it, don't really know how. I just started eating a little more one day, and slowly my eating became fairly normal. I'm willing to admit that I'm still a little disappointed in myself, sadly enough.

    Nevertheless, that didn't mean that I got out of my happy-when-depressed funk. And a while after the eating disorder thing, I discovered drugs.

    Not to say that I've ever had any huge drug problems. I haven't. I had a period where I wouldn't even get out of bed with out chemical assistance from amphetamines, but they're amphetaminesfor Christ's sake. So, no, I would never say that I had any real problems....Still, I managed to recreate some of the same feelings tht I got from not eating with drugs. The shitty, empty feeling. I feel justified coming down from things. It's somehow right that I should feel so awful. I like being e-pressed. I like comming down from a long acid trip and seeing how bland, and ugly, and colorless the world is and hating it, I like the feeling I get after tweaking too long and too hard and being the last one up and knowing that I did a great job at killing all the cartilage in my nose and that I lost that 10 pounds because of meand my unhealthy drug habits. I enjoy being a smoker. I enjoy not feeding myself well(in a non-anorexic way....I think). I....well, you get what I'm trying to say.

    Yeah, I'm a little smarter now than I was in 8th grade. Or maybe I just like myself more. Cuz as much as I would have liked it, I never developed a real drug problem. Bizarre as that may sound to most of you, hopefully some of you will get it.
    Glad that's off my chest.

    ------------------
    Those who find ugly meaning in beautiful things are corrupt without being charming. flux@bluelight.ru
    [This message has been edited by flux (edited 22 June 2000).]



    Wow you sound like you have some sriouse problems, maybe you need a phsychiarist. SWIM started getting high on weed, and drinking lightly with friends at about 12-13, but when SWIM did it it was for the fun of it. SWIM used to smoke a joint of shwag with freinds and laugh his ass off for hours. Did shrooms a few times, but cant do them anymore Cause of too Much things on SWIM'S mind But SWIM'S fave drug of choice are opiates, they just make swim feel so productive, and happy. He is encuraged to do everything he need to do during the day, even workout and play sports, so they are a wonder drug for SWIM, SWIM have a mild case of Generalized Anxiety Disorder, and all the dick doctors HE'S been to never give him the Benzo's that will actually do the job right, so Opiates and xanax and valium from the streets are a life saver. Too bad opiats are soooo addicting, but good thing SWIM has a good reliable source so SWIM is always prepared. 40 and 60 OXY's, Xanax bars, valium, klonopin, perc, vicodin, and oh so many other goodies half off of street prices!
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    Greenlighter
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    Wow you sound like you have some sriouse problems, maybe you need a phsychiarist. SWIM started getting high on weed, and drinking lightly with friends at about 12-13, but when SWIM did it it was for the fun of it. SWIM used to smoke a joint of shwag with freinds and laugh his ass off for hours. Did shrooms a few times, but cant do them anymore Cause of too Much things on SWIM'S mind But SWIM'S fave drug of choice are opiates, they just make swim feel so productive, and happy. He is encuraged to do everything he need to do during the day, even workout and play sports, so they are a wonder drug for SWIM, SWIM have a mild case of Generalized Anxiety Disorder, and all the dick doctors HE'S been to never give him the Benzo's that will actually do the job right, so Opiates and xanax and valium from the streets are a life saver. Too bad opiats are soooo addicting, but good thing SWIM has a good reliable source so SWIM is always prepared. 40 and 60 OXY's, Xanax bars, valium, klonopin, perc, vicodin, and oh so many other goodies half off of street prices!
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    My 2 cents,

    I started getting high at 14 mostly on weed and LSD and would take trips every weekend, at 15 I discovered the joys of old skool ecstasy and also regluarly took amph this would also become an every weekend thing, at 16 I tried coke still carried on taking E till was about 21 but then coke took over and became my mainstay of use alongside weed, 22 years later Iam still with the coke although I can dabble in MDMA once in a blue moon, but today Iam a coke,alcohol,weed and benzo man most definately.
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    Bluelighter mymindisgoo's Avatar
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    when i was 14, no one ever told me that i shouldnt snort a percocet and xanax together, let alone a perc. so i did, and i stayed away til i was 18 (i was smoking, shrooming and coking with the later two more occasionally than the former)
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    Bluelighter Mr_Fluffykins's Avatar
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    by 14 i was drinking, and smoking weed, you can get fucked up on both of thoose,

    by 15 i was doing E a few times and doing shrooms

    by 16 i was dong a shit tonne of E

    by 17 i had tried coke,
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