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Thread: Embarassing sex stories...

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    #51
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    I think i need to get some, its been wayyyyyy too long and I have no stories
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    #52
    Unhappy
    Most embarassing thing happened 11 years ago. It was about 2am. I had bedroom light on inside. I found out too late that even with the bedroom blinds pulled all the way down, without curtains in the apartment, if it is dark out and the light is on inside AND someone stands with his hands cupped to the little tiny section that holds the blinds together,(the string that holds the blinds together and the little holes that allow for binding) you can pretty much see what's going on. I had been horny one night and was masturbating with a dildo a long time. I became aware of this tapping noise. I stopped. Then the noise stopped.

    It started up again 15 minutes later. This time I knew someone was definately at my bedroom window. I put a robe on, and peeked out the blinds. This guy was standing there asking me to let him in cause some guys were threatening to kick his ass.
    I called the cops and while I waited for them to show up, he knocked again. This time he said "Let me in. I want a woman to please me." He then proceeded to go around the entire apartment trying to get in any windows, or doors, but they were locked.

    I called the cops back and told them what he said. I asked them to please come immediately. They caught him as he was climbing the wall of my small backyard and arrested him. I had to identify him through the window. They asked me if I wanted him arrested and I said yes. I heard him asking the cops, "What's going on?," to which a lady cop said, "I don't know, but I think your under arrest." Shortly after that he was taken to the gray bar, but that was pretty bad. Fuck knowing he saw everything...oh well. I complained to the apartment manager and she had curtains put on my windows after that.
    Last edited by PsychoKitten; 07-01-2004 at 09:54.
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    #53
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    Originally posted by TJ:
    Most embarassing thing happened 11 years ago. It was about 2am...
    Jesus! That's not embarrassing that's downright SCARY!!!!
    THank goodness you're ok.
    -physix
    Last edited by PsychoKitten; 04-01-2004 at 14:29.
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    #54
    Bluelighter
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    Well last night a girl that I have started to see recently and I were in my truck and it started to get hot and heavy so I said/suggested that we get it on in the truck ( I have a Quad cab turck, so it would not be that hard to do something in there) anyway she agrees and says for me to pull into the driveway ( we could not go in inside her house because her cousin and kids were in there, and she has no bedroom) so we get it on, and after we are done I look to my left and I see her neighbor sitting on his porch looking at my truck, well I do have tinited windows the only thing is that she left her shirt on and it was a white shirt at that, so I can imagine that he saw something white moving up and down and front to back, all while my truck is rocking, and her moaning. So we leave to go get something to drink and come back 2-3 minutes later and the fucker is still sitting on his porch (I do not know about you, but if I see my neighbor is fucking/getting fucked I do not want to see it) But it is his yard, and we were outside so hey what are you going to do right? I drop her off and I left. Another thing is I know my girl didn't know that her neighbor had been watching us. And I intend to keep it that way.
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    #55
    Bluelighter liquidocean's Avatar
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    Red face
    ^ It's should be understood that the courteous thing to do when noticing other people having sex is not to gawk and stare forever, but get a quick look then bail.
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    #56
    Bluelighter Sweetpea's Avatar
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    or hide in the bushes
    (they sell travel size astroglide)
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    #57
    Bluelighter DjIgnite's Avatar
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    Originally posted by PsychoKitten:
    This from a few months ago would have embarrassed the hell out of most ppl. It turned me on something fierce tho.
    I'm out for drink with my then partner. We end up at one of my fave places - this really cosy bar with old fashioned booths. So we're sitting there n playing footsie and I decide to umm "slip under the table".
    So I'm under there, with my mouth busy and his friends walk into the place, spot him and come over to sit down. Note: I am still under the table. They stayed for ages, while I played him like a bloody violin. They stayed so long that in the end I had no choice but to finish him off and pop up back into my seat.
    Classy huh, you should have seen the faces on those guys. Figuing i was in for it, i decided to make the most of it and I looked each one in the eye as i wiped my bottom lip with my finger, licked it clean then calmly replaced my lipstick.
    marry me.
    most embarassing, huh? i'll make it short and simple.
    '96, yankee stadium, blow job, big screen.
    [ 09 August 2002: Message edited by: DjIgnite ]
    Last edited by PsychoKitten; 04-01-2004 at 14:31.
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    #58
    Bluelighter trancechyck's Avatar
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    lmao DjIgnite u poor bugger~!! ... but nice !!! i wish i was that adventurous!
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    #59
    Angry
    This didn't happen to me personally, however one night when I was out with friends, this guy told me this story. OMG I coulnd't believe it. I thought it was funnier than fuck. I know I'd have been 50 shades of red had it been me instead of him.

    The Slave

    One night Danny, TJ's roommate brought home this 21 y/o black woman that happened to be a dominatrix. Neither TJ or Crystal (TJ's name for alter ego on speed) had never actually met one before. She couldn't remember exactly when these events occured, but it was in 1997 between the months of Jan and June.
    In those days at that time, she was happy cause she did what she loved doing best. Snorting speed, mixing speed into a soda and drinking it, or putting speed in empty capsules to carry with her with the straw and the mirror were just not practical.

    Psychologically, she enjoyed the line more because unlike with a pill or soda, she could see how much she was doing and feel like she actually consumed it, having seen it slowly disappear up her nose. Of course, TJ loved Crystal and enjoyed her company in a variety of ways.

    It was during this time period that she had worked solely as an exotic dancer. Crystal was great at dancing and always alot of fun to take to parties. She was also very sociable, and as it was most of the time, TJ and Crystal were having a great time.
    Although they had great fun when it was just the two of them, neither of them minded meeting new individuals and the company of others. Unbeknownst to most people or strangers back then, the person they were introduced to as TJ, had no way of knowing they were really chatting with Crystal Hyde. They were one and the same, similar, yet very different and took turns seeing the world, as opposed to one or the other remaining dormat in the closet.

    85% of the time, Crystal was the one lurking about, going about life sharing one body, but different minds. The other 15% of the time TJ would perhaps come join the world and have her turn in their shared life on the outside.

    Although Crystal during those times of 1997 would be the one to dominate the show, TJ didn't mind kicking it in the closet while simultaneously tripping on her partner and soul sister in crime, the funny, most off the wall, and outgoing Crystal Hyde.
    The night Danny brought home his friend Sandy, Crystal/TJ became quite fascinated when Sandy told her she had an actual dungeon at her home. She worked for herself, making money from her clients by being a Dom. Of course when Sandy invited TJ to go to her house the next night so she could see her home and her dungeon, she jumped at the chance.

    Sandy told TJ to be there at 5:00pm. Crystal came instead 5:00pm TST. Tweeker Standard Time which translated that night to 8:00pm PST. Hearing comments and/questions pertaining to the fact she was a bit late, were like more common than not. Crystal would always give some off the wall explanation, and the entertainment value depended entirely upon the mood/trip she happened to be riding at the moment.

    No one ever knew with Crystal, but she could always be counted on to be amuzing, bizarre, and happy, if nothing else. When she finally arrived at Sandy's TST, she was introduced to her boyfriend a white man that had remarked many times that he wanted some chocolate that night. Sitting across from him was a very handsome man, probably in his early 40's. He was tall, had a tone/muscular build, a full head of silvery/black hair dressed in a suit. He was kicking back, socializing, and drinking a beer.

    It was an added form of pleasure when Sandy introduced the gentleman as her slave. He said after their weekly session he wanted permission from his Mistress to take us all to Bennihanna. So after Sandy gave Crystal a tour of the dungeoun, TJ saw and heard everything and listened as Crystal asked all sorts of questions and was shown some exotic equipment used for recreation and entertainment favored by the dom/slave and S&M culture.

    There was a sort of cage especially suited to those adult baby slaves or that would benefit a great deal from being in a cage. Then there was a cross shaped device used for standing a slave up and strapping them securely down and of course a varity of floggs, chastity belts, handcuffs, nipple clamps, chains, collar and leash, and some sort of torture device that looked alot like the iron maiden, built not to kill, only to cause exquisite pain.
    Sandy explained that the Dom/Slave thing was 90% mental trip and the other 10% actual hands on type deal. Going back out to the room to rejoin the slave and Sandy's boyfriend, Crystal loved to tell about the joys of her job as an exotic dancer. Sandy had said she thought being a Dom was easier, as one didn't have to fiddle around with removing the many layers of garments, undergarments and putting them on, changing in the right fashion.

    Of course Crystal loved it. She loved dancing. She loved music, and she loved stripping cause she was performing. There was nothing more she loved than being on stage. When one of them asked if she minded doing a show for them, Crystal of course was delighted. She had brought with her, the special mix of music suited to whatever role she wanted to play. And role play she did right there in the living room as Sandy and the slave took photos at her request.

    After all the energic, fun, wild dancing, she switched to a "fuck me come hither sort of role" and stripped to sexy soul and rhythm and blues. When she was finished, she was decorated with frilly lace on her arms, legs, stomach, groin, but her breasts and exposed firm cheecks could be viewed surrounded or peeking out of necklace beads and lace. The feather was the final touch.
    At the end of the show she let the feather run over every crevice of her body and exposing her pose sitting with legs wide opened, but crotch covered by see through frail type material resembling a face through a veil. Partially seen/partially hidden. Taking some water and letting it fall off those small, perky tits that were great for taking shots of anything running right from the tit to the mouth, her show ended.

    The slave stood up, giving a standing ovation, then the other 2 followed suit. Standing there and changing from her teddy and lace into her evening dress right in front of everyone so her attire was acceptable for the restaurante, TJ listened intently as the slave was so taken he said,"That was beautiful, sensual, and hot! Damn you got me horny and now my cock hurts!,"
    Then he said that he was wearing a metal chastity belt his Mistress had ordered him to wear that very moment. "Really?" asked Crystal. "And," the slave went on to explain only his Mistress had the key. Of course, it was exquisitely painful he said any and every time he got hard. "Here would you like to see?" asked the slave. Crystal answered in the affirmative. "Well I'll be damned," said Crystal. There was no getting out of that contraption alright. There had been a small screen allowing for the passage of urine.

    This was so fascinating and funny that she forgot to ask what happened if he needed to do #2. There were 2 other little bits of amuzing information he passed on. He said that his wife became most irritated by it because that meant no sex for a week. "Your're married?," Crystal asked even more amuzed. "Married with 2 kids and my wife knows all about my weekly sessions with my Mistress," he said. This story kept getting better and better.

    On the way over to Bennihanna, Crystal rode with the slave in his car and Sandy and her bf in theirs. He indicated that he wore that chastiy belt quite often and he loved it. He loved everything about being a slave. He looked like a CEO or executive. She found it amuzing wondering what his high powered collegues would have to say or think if they knew of their boss/collegues submissive proclivities. The last bit of his most delightful tale was the best though.

    One night he had had one or two too many beers and of course the cops pulled him over. Actually he wasn't rip roaring drunk, but enough to be escorted and cuffed to remain an overnight guest of The Gray Bar. He was booked, fingerprinted, questioned, the whole nine yards. His real entertainment began when the cops found out he was wearing a gift from his Mistress.

    Of course they asked him all kinds of questions. Cops have very inquiring minds. But the mental picture she got when the cops first became aware he was wearing a chastiy belt, then the looks on their faces when he told them the chastity belt belonged to his Mistress was worth money.

    Her favorite part was when they demanded that he take it off. Of course he told them he couldn't because only his Mistress had the key. Then they tried to get it off themselves repeatedly and they couldn't. So finally his Mistress recieved a phone call from his hosts at The Gray Bar informing her that they had one of her slaves in custody and they would very much appreciate her cooperation in producing the key, as chastiy belts were not acceptable attire and insisted all guests refrain from wearing them.

    They would be locked away in a special safe and returned to him at the end of his stay. Since they put it like that, how could she find it in her heart to refuse? "That was most embarrassing indeed," said the slave. "I guess so," said Crystal laughing and enjoying the fuck out of his tale. Once at the restaurante, Crystal sipped on a coke as the others ate dinner. Had her alter ego/soul sister TJ been present that night instead of merely observing, a coke is still all she would have consumed.

    Both Crystal and TJ hated sea food anyway, which is what Crystal had said. At least it was cheaper for the slave. After the restaurante, the slave deposited Crystal in front of her car. Both Crystal and the slave bid Sandy and her bf goodnight. "Goodnight Mistress," he said. "See you next week." "It's definately been a very enjoyable evening," said Crystal to the slave. "You try to be a good boy now and maybe your Mistress won't find it necessary to enforce this discipline," she said to the slave. He only grinned, and like all true slaves, indicated that he would not be a good boy. Some things never change.
    Last edited by PsychoKitten; 07-01-2004 at 09:57.
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    #60
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    Originally posted by TJ:
    Most embarassing thing happened 11 years ago. It was about 2am. I had bedroom light on inside. I found out too late that even with the bedroom blinds pulled all the way down, without curtains in the apartment, if it is dark out and the light is on inside AND someone stands with his hands cupped to the little tiny section that holds the blinds together,(the string that holds the blinds together and the little holes that allow for binding) you can pretty much see what's going on. I had been horny one night and was masturbating with a dildo a long time. I became aware of this tapping noise. I stopped. Then the noise stopped.
    It started up again 15 minutes later. This time I knew someone was definately at my bedroom window. I put a robe on, and peeked out the blinds. This guy was standing there asking me to let him in cause some guys were threatening to kick his ass.
    I called the cops and while I waited for them to show up, he knocked again. This time he said "Let me in. I want a woman to please me." He then proceeded to go around the entire apartment trying to get in any windows, or doors, but they were locked.
    I called the cops back and told them what he said. I asked them to please come immediately. They caught him as he was climbing the wall of my small backyard and arrested him. I had to identify him through the window. They asked me if I wanted him arrested and I said yes. I heard him asking the cops, "What's going on?," to which a lady cop said, "I don't know, but I think your under arrest." Shortly after that he was taken to the gray bar, but that was pretty bad. Fuck knowing he saw everything...oh well. I complained to the apartment manager and she had curtains put on my windows after that.
    Shouldnt this be in the erotic stories thread?
    Last edited by PsychoKitten; 04-01-2004 at 14:31.
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    #61
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    Originally posted by *PoRn*sTaR*:
    I think i need to get some, its been wayyyyyy too long and I have no stories
    yeah I know that one well ...
    Last edited by PsychoKitten; 04-01-2004 at 14:32.
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    #62
    Bluelighter
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    Wink
    Back in high school I was "dating around" and lacking a better place to go this guy and I decided to park at the desolate end of a dead-end street. We start to have sex when this cop pulls up, gets out and knocks on the window. The cop politely walked away a minute & the poor boy was all flustered and hurrying to get his clothes on while I took my sweet old time. The cop returned and tapped on the glass again. I still wasn't dressed so I yelled to him to "hold on a minute" as I opened the car door to be able to stand and put on my panties and pants. My boy and the cop were a little embarassed at that.
    Well, the next week I was with the boy in the park under the kiddie slide (it was boxed in fort-like). We're going at it when we see headlights. Next, the search light is scanning the park and detects us moving under the slide to put our clothes back on. We dress then get out from under the slide and walk up to the cop car. We were busted by the SAME cop!
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    #63
    Arrow
    Originally posted by masheadatronic:

    Shouldnt this be in the erotic stories thread?
    No it should not! I certainly found nothing erotic about doing what I was doing only to find out some dick head was spying on me. And yeah to repeat that was EMBARRASING as hell.
    Last edited by PsychoKitten; 04-01-2004 at 14:33.
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    #64
    Ninja
    That's funnier than fuck! That was definately a kodak moment. Hehehe.
    Ok one more time. The chick who got busted by the same cop twice was funny. I've not been successful doing the " " thing....so last time. Hope it works this time.
    [ 12 August 2002: Message edited by: TJ ]
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    #65
    Red face
    My experience could have been mortifying had i not been with a boyfriend i'd been with for years and was totally comfortable with.
    We're messing around and stuff, and its dark, and i reach for the ky jelly and rub it on his penis and start playing with it, and as I'm doing it, I'm thinking 'gee the ky jelly smells nice' and then i start thinking 'hang on, it doesnt normally have a smell', and i kind of panic, turn on the light and instead of ky ive accidently grabbed a tube of swaschkoff hair gell/wax and have put that all over him.
    He wasnt too impressed, but i have to say, i havent laughed that much in ages. Ahh, you just have to laugh these things off...
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    #66
    Post
    My boyfriend and I were up in my room (this is when I still lived with my parents), we thought that we had the whole house to ourselves for the weekend, as my parents were out of town and my little brother was at HIS girlfriend's house.
    We had sex on the floor in my room and then when we were done we went downstairs (buck naked) and he started to make dinner and I was playing the piano.
    Suddenly, I heard the front door opening and I panicked, frozen naked at the piano like a deer in the headlights.
    My brother opened the door. He was carrying a suitcase which he dropped on the ground.
    "Kenny!" I said, my heart racing. He didn't reply, he just stood there looking shocked. My little brother hadn't seen me naked since I was, probably about 7 or something, and I feel sorry for him because I would NEVER want to see him naked. Especially at the piano.
    ack
    "Oh my god, whose suitcase is that?" I said.
    "Dad's!" my brother said.
    I screamed to my boyfriend to get dressed and I ran upstairs. My Dad must have been bringing in something from the car or maybe my little brother was stalling him, but my boy and I were able to get our clothes on before my Dad came upstairs with his luggage.
    "Oh, hi Dad!" I said, trying to sound casual.
    "Good Lord," said my father, wrinkling his nose. "It smells like a French whorehouse up here."
    I am so dead, I thought. I am so, so dead. I have no idea what my boyfriend was thinking, but probably something along those same lines.
    "Your brother wears so much goddamned cheap colonge," my Dad said. "It stinks up the whole house."
    -Aura
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    #67
    Bluelighter
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    Thumbs up
    ^
    LMAO!!!!
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    #68
    Wink
    Well this was about 4 years ago, my gf and I were downstairs in her room, kissing/groaping/fingers roaming etc.
    We were almost to the point of ripping each others remaining clothes off and fucking like bunnies (I had my boxers on, she had most of her clothes on) when, without a knock, mom walks in.
    If not for a strategically placed blanket, it would have been all over. There would have been no "explaining it" my tent was raised
    "Dinner is almost ready, what are you two doing?"
    "Just resting mom"
    As it turns out, I pulled off being tired quite well.
    Good idea for a topic!
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    #69
    Bluelighter
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    My friend Joel and I were working hard to beat the last Zelda right before the new one came out. We spent days straight sitting in his living room, getting high and making sexual innuendos at each other. We finally beat the game and as a celebration we convened to his room to smoke. His parents and younger sister were asleep down the hall.
    We both collapsed onto the bed and then half-turned to each other to talk, and all of a sudden we were making out and ripping off our clothes. We went at it for a while and had just changed positions when I looked up and noticed his dad standing in the doorway, holding a bat. I had NO IDEA how long he had been standing there, staring at me on top of his son.
    We both covered up as quickly as we could... turns out he had heard me making noise and thought there was someone in the house attacking his daughter.
    I still haven't been back to their house.
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    #70
    Post
    My most embarrasing... not very
    I had a party a few weeks back where I hooked up with a girl that came after going out and drinking WAY too much we came home with some friends who were crashing here. we all came upstairs to my room for a while where I kicked em out for some shagging fun
    half an hour later we are at it drunk as skunks then silly me thinks time for her to be on top so I grab her and roll on to my back. Not knowing that there is no bed there BANG we hit the ground and kept going right there.
    Next morning friend whoo stayed downstairs "hey woody did you fall out of bed??"
    Me:"Ummm no oh thats right"(where i remember falling out of bed)
    Friend" thats right what??"
    me:"oh I fell over looking for my ciggies"
    Sorta got out of it...
    On a funnier not I remember going to a house warming party where the girl who lived there had a whole bunch of friendss from out of town staying. She was giving the grand tour of the house and walks in to the "Spare" roomabout 10 people behind her she turns on the light. One of her high school mates was getting it from behind (backs facing us) and it took them till the laughter to realise that the light was turned on. Now that would be embarrassing.
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    #71
    Peace
    I was giving head for the first time in a car, and these little kids came up and started looking in the window, then their parents were comming to get them and it was scarry and embarresing, yeah thats my story.
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    #72
    Bluelighter clop's Avatar
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    Look I'm sorry but these stories are just not cutting it. Being caught or observed engaged in some kind of sexual activity is hardly a chart topper in the embarrassment stakes.. you lot would make lousy porn stars. And what's the big deal with blood round your mouth? Oh come on.
    *** EMBARRASSING ***
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    #73
    Bluelighter clop's Avatar
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    Originally posted by CBRworm:
    This was embarrassing to me, funny to others. I was a senior in high school, and liked this girl, S, in my physics class, I was trying to pull off the act of innocent, nice guy. a friend of mines parents were out of town so I was staying there for the weekend. My friend goes to a party, and I know he won't be back for many hours, probably not tonight. I hook up with this other girl, T, and take her back to his house. She and I are on the floor in the living room going at it, when the front door opens, and about 20 people walk in. Apparently the party my friend was at was busted, so he brought everyone back to his house. I wouldn't have been too embarrassed, except that the girl I liked (S) was in the crowd, and saw me on the floor with Tammy. I never did hook up with stephanie.
    Edited to protect the innocent
    [ 12 August 2002: Message edited by: CBRworm ]
    And CBRworm, what the fuck was the point of calling her S all the way through your story and then giving her full name right at the end?!
    clopster
    Last edited by PsychoKitten; 04-01-2004 at 14:33.
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    #74
    Post
    Calling the girls S and T and then revealing their names at the end of the story while saying 'to protect the innocent' is considered humorous by most humans.
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    #75
    Bluelighter PsychoKitten's Avatar
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    In Australia it's illegal to sell handcuffs without a safety release, however my then boyfriend was a bit of a smart ass and decided they'd be better if he shaved the release off, which was fine cause we had the keys on a hook near the bed.
    So we're staying at a swanky hotel on a dirty weekender when he gets the cuffs out and we start playing which was great until we get to the uh-oh moment where he realises he didn't pack the keys. So what does he do? He calls the concierge who says he'll send a maintenance man up. 3 maintenance men later and I'm still cuffed to the bed naked with a sheet over me, waiting for the locksmith to arrive.
    Everyone in the hotel knew, and for the rest of the weekend we couldn't go anywhere without people getting the giggles when we charged things to our room, not to mention that the 3am call out fee from the locksmith put a bit of a dent in our budget.
    [ 25 November 2002: Message edited by: PsychoKitten ]
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