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Positive The Tapering Supportive/Social Thread

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Check anyplace that sells marijuana pipes and such. Most ‘head shops’ will have it in small vitamin bottles, Sometimes at gas stations, with cigarettes and beer. A good starting dose is about 1-2 grams. If it works, go online and buy it in powder form from any importer. The cost per dose ranges from $5 at a gas station to $0.25 if you buy in bulk onlibe.
 
The nice thing about Kratom: As long as its not closer to a meal than 30 minutes, you can take it on an empty or full stomach and it works in 15-45 minutes. It is related to coffee, so it might keep you awake if you take it less than 2 hours before bedtime (some people sleep fantastic on Kratom, so it might be worth a shot)
 
Squeaky said:
Dundermifflin8699- try this thought on for size:
I ran out of pills every month for two years. Day 3 or day 4 is the worst and I paid with my day 3/4 so many times I deserved to have frequent flyer miles to the land of Suck. But it never got easier except that I learned the pattern and I got good at hating life.
I went through the absolute worst part of withdrawals too many times to count. Every time I got my bottle of pills I would use them to help get past my withdrawals, but I had already suffered through the hardest part. By starting over I was actually setting myself to suffer the hardest part again, all in the name of avoiding the easy part.
You have already done the hardest part. That first night of insomnia is horrible. The first couple of days are absolutely miserable. That bottle of pills means you get back on the roller coaster, but not at the beginning. You get back on AFTER the point when the pills stopped making you feel really great, but just before the part where you start your withdrawals.
Imagine if I slept with the most beautiful girl in town. It was awesome until later I found out she was happily married. Then her husband finds out and kicks my ass. When I have a dream later about our encounter I’m going to want to go back to right before the sex, and wake up before the husband finds out. If you get that script refilled..... You’re going to skip the sex, go straight to the minute before her husband finds out, and keep getting your ass kicked over and over again.
You can’t undo the past, but you can change the future. I spent too much time glorifying what I thought was some beautiful version of history as if there was some way of reliving only the good parts. Stick with your plan for a little while longer. It WILL get easier. Quit now and you lived through the last two days for nothing. At least get to where you can see the difference between life with the pills and life without. At least then you can make a more informed decision.
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Thanks, good stuff...
Man ive lived your description for lots of years..
Groundhog days..over and over..
The last week, brutal...
Im past the hell, but need to learn how to interpret pain in healthy manner..

Minute,hour, day at a time..
 
To live with physical pain..whew

There are successful applications in learning how to interpret pain in a different way...

Im so tired..didnt sleep for over a week..
 
Dundermifflin8699 said:
Think im hitting the PAWS..
sh$t

Just paid some guy to mow my lawn..
No energy..
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It's gonna take a while for you to get your energy back dude, not gonna sugar-coat it :(
But please try very hard to not take any tramadol, it will just take you straight back to square one and you'll have to start all over again. You know this.
You're absolutely right, you will have to learn ways to process and respond to pain differently. You will have to learn to FEEL it and to COPE with it. I know this from first hand experience, a) with pain issues, and b) from opiate withdrawals. Distraction is a very valuable tool in learning to get through pain. For really severe pain, please talk to your doctor about alternative methods.
 
n3ophy7e said:
It's gonna take a while for you to get your energy back dude, not gonna sugar-coat it :(
But please try very hard to not take any tramadol, it will just take you straight back to square one and you'll have to start all over again. You know this.
You're absolutely right, you will have to learn ways to process and respond to pain differently. You will have to learn to FEEL it and to COPE with it. I know this from first hand experience, a) with pain issues, and b) from opiate withdrawals. Distraction is a very valuable tool in learning to get through pain. For really severe pain, please talk to your doctor about alternative methods.
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Thank you so much
Was gonna binge watch Homeland on Netflix
 
That's it man, take it one minute, or even one second at a time if that's what it takes.

How you doing now?
 
n3ophy7e said:
That's it man, take it one minute, or even one second at a time if that's what it takes.

How you doing now?
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Rough walking around in raw pain...
I took 1/2 tramadol...

But I feel i can push thru..
I pretty much know it's going to take weeks or months for the neurotransmitters to return to normal, and that's just a given..

But man I don't want to be a slave to this s*** anymore...

Thank you
 
Dundermifflin8699 said:
But man I don't want to be a slave to this s*** anymore...
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THAT'S the thing you've gotta keep reminding yourself, you don't ever wanna go through this again. You can do it man, keep it up <3
How much Homeland did you get through? Have you watched Dexter? I recently re-watched all of that. It's on Stan though, not Netflix.
 
n3ophy7e said:
THAT'S the thing you've gotta keep reminding yourself, you don't ever wanna go through this again. You can do it man, keep it up <3
How much Homeland did you get through? Have you watched Dexter? I recently re-watched all of that. It's on Stan though, not Netflix.
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Watched last 2 seasons of Homeland that I never ended up seeing...
Thinking about rewatching season 1 through 3 with Brody, such suspense..
 
cowboycurtis said:
The thing with buprenorphine that I think a lot of people don't understand is that it doesn't take much to take away withdrawals. I think a lot of people, myself included, shoot themselves in the foot by taking a massive dose of buprenorphine and then getting stuck at that high dose which makes it that much harder to taper off. Subs are a great tool to stave off withdrawals and honestly, like Snafu said, trying to taper off of street heroin is an impossible task. For me a dose as little as 4 mg of buprenorphine will keep me well. It might take a little more to completely kill the cravings, but 4 mg should get you feeling normal enough to get shit done. And even then, if you do go higher, there's no need to really go above 16 mg. there's a steep dose-response curve with buprenorphine and any dose higher than 16mg is only going to be fractionally more effective, if at all. So ya, my recommendation would be to get enough subs to plan a decent taper and only take enough to feel well. It ain't gonna get you high so you can forget about that. No point in prolonging the inevitable for a shitty bupe high.
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I brought myself off a heroin habit by using methadone someone had saved me out of their takeaways (they were on a large enough dose to skim a bit daily over a period)

I ws trveling with relatives at the time, and made sure that i rigorously halved the dose each day without fail...it was brutal I sweated my way around Tasmainia lol where other passengers remarked on me putting on and taking off clothes consstantly. But I did it...mmain thing is you have to recongnise you can't be comfortable; its just taking the edge off so you will be able to ge through it eventually
 
Damn dude. That’s awesome.
Ever since I came clean to my wife about my pills, I have somehow come up with a new attitude. Believe it or not, I’m in a lot less pain and it started the minute I finally decided I was done.
Every time I ran out of pills I would have terrible aches and pains, most of which were seemingly connected to my back surgeries. Sprinkle in a little depression, insomnia, and general aches. I went through that for so long that I must have completely forgot how it felt to be hopeful about anything except getting a refill. Somehow I hit bottom when I had to admit to stealing pills and all of that changed. Suddenly the endless pain I was in sort if faded into the background and it all became more like soreness from a hard workout. I’m not saying I have no more problems, withdrawals or otherwise, but I feel like the hopelessness seems to have been causing me more physical pains than anything else.
All I’m saying is that if I can make it then there is hope for a better life, but I needed to change my mindset. Everyone and every situation is different so I don’t claim to have found the Holy Grail, but there is some magic in a positive outlook. I used to think that if it didn’t kill me then it couldn’t be hurting me very much. Now I feel like it WAS killing me slowly, very slowly but definitely taking me to an early grave.
I haven’t figured out what I was doing wrong throughout that whole time. Years of pills pills and more pills. Blaming my problems on bad luck. Telling myself it’s hopeless. Convinced that life would ve DIFFERENT without the pills but not necessarily better. Grateful that my Dr wasn’t hitting me up for a drug test or pill counts. And saying it’s not my fault but feeling like there was nothing more I could do. All the while wanting a life free from the pills.
I don’t walk outside and appreciate the warmth of the sun, or any stupid romantic new view of life. I do however genuinely believe that those pills were given to me with the singular goal of making me a regular customer. Any pain relief I may have had was coincidental. The Dr who wrote me the first prescription that got me addicted (not my first prescription of opiates, just the first one for oxy 30’s) did it purposely to get me on the hook. After that the pills did all of the work and I was blinded to the fallout. I have done some stuff I’m really not proud of and spent tons of money in trips to the pharmacy and lost wages. All I can see now is all of the negative effects, none of what I thought were positive effects. Somehow at the moment my thinking changed I got a blast of energy and the hopelessness disappeared within a few hours.
Now I feel like I spent the whole weekend moving furniture and I just have to wait until the sore muscles get better, instead of desperation that leads to longing for my pills.

Dunno if that helps you..... but it might have helped me a few months ago. If you go back to the beginning if this thread. Pokemana’s last couple of posts. She talked about being free from her oxymorphine and how open her future felt not needing to see the Dr every month. That really stuck with me. I have wanted to be in that place for a few years now, and I feel like I might be close.
 
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