Lost my virginity in a threesome.
First time having sex was with an attractive goth punk coworker who worked in the pet hospital morgue of our establishment, along with her obese roommate of which I assure you was not part of the deal, nor was the threesome itself for that matter. She called me to come over after work and smoke her out, which back in 2002 was a big deal if you had access to quality weed; you would have friends of all contingencies and every clique. However, upon my arrival she immediately lead me by the hand upstairs into her bedroom which was noticably devoid of any furnishings sans for a king size bed, of which the aforementioned whale of a woman was laying about quite lazily, as they do. It is probably important to note that I was heavily into Adderall during this period and at most weighed 119 pounds soaking wet, the result of which made me appear much younger than my age of 17. My coworker was around 24 or 25 and no, I was not statutorily raped. I was frequently the object of flirting at that time, though too awkward to take advantage of those opportunities or if so I was always too nervous to get it up. Reflecting back on this era remains perhaps the single greatest regret in my life, after trying and developing a lifelong affliction with heroin. In fact to this very day I still hold on to my ID card from that time and whenever I display it to anyone they almost always compliment my radically different physical appearance. Oh, to be young again but with my current depth of emotional maturity... I was so young that I depended upon my father for a ride over there at 11:30PM. My pops has always been an encouraging wingman.
In the grazing heffer's hands she cradled a Jerome Baker glass bong, the bowl of which became immediately established that I was obviously expected to fill and admittedly rightly so, after all that was the entire reason I was invited over to begin with. With nowhere else to kick off my shoes and relax my socks I sat down on the bed which prompted Moby Dick to beach herself closer to me. As I began loading the bowl she placed a firm hand on my thigh with an almost admirable intrepidness. Keep in mind I was but an innocent youth desperate to shed my virginity, and though I came close a myriad of times I could never rise to the occasion and perform which was of major concern until I quit using Adderall, after which I came to the realization that it was the chemical culprit responsible for my many prior flaccid failures. Now there I was with the Great Beast's lobster cracking manos massaging my inner thigh and yet I remained steadfast in fulfilling my duty to tend to the bowl. I was simply far too young and naive to interpret physical advances of flirting, etc.
Meanwhile, my coworker disappeared into her walk-in closet.
I gave the roommate the bong so she could take greens and it was precisely at that moment when my coworker reappeared returned from the closet, only now she appeared to have misplaced her clothes, garbed only in a G-string and topless. Being quite young at the time (18!) I was not attuned to the atmosphere preceding their intended sex act and honestly thought I was supposed to look away, as though she were unaware her breasts were accidentally exposed. Suddenly her roommate removed her pants and panties and I watched in stunned silence as my coworker began to go down on her. Then she told me to strip so I complied diligently. Coworker and I briefly had sex doggy style while she continued to eat out her roommate, but I was so intimidated and confused that I couldn't maintain an erection. Coworker tried to get me hard, but it wasn't happening so I left with my tail between my legs. That's how I "lost" my virginity.
The second time was preplanned and remains to this day the Everest peak of my sexual conquests. My girlfriend at the time and I were both waiting at a bus stop when this hot junkie chick walked by, paused, quickly turned back around and took a seat near my girl. She asked if we knew where to score some black and it just so happened I already had a fair amount on me as we had just picked up. The girl and I handled our business and then exchanged contact info.
When she called the next day I straight up asked her if she was interested in participating in a threesome with us and I'd supply free dope. She was incredulous at first, inquiring as to whether or not my girl was aware I cheat on her to which I retorted, "I've never cheated on anyone in my entire life and the threesome is her idea. She's always wanted to hook up with a girl and we both think you're hot,"
Of course she still didn't believe me so I gave her my girl's phone number and told her to inquire for herself. To my surprise she actually did call and my girlfriend confirmed everything I said to be truth. She then called me back and agreed on a place, date and time.
Few days later I paid for the agreed upon motel room and at first my girl and I both believed the girl had developed a severe case of frostbitten cold feet as an entire hour had passed by our agreed meetup time, but lo and behold she eventually showed up. Her first words were, "I bet you didn't think I was going to show up,".
She asked to use the shower to freshen up so I used the time to prepare our works so we could all fix before the deed. After the shower she made her grand entrance, with her hair down and beautifully draped over her breasts. We all got loaded and for a slight moment nobody said anything. She initiated it like a boss, saying something to the effect of (I'm paraphrasing), "well, let's fucking do this!"
Goddamn. Now THAT was hot. This time I was 28 years old with a few notches on my belt. I'll spare you the steamy details except for this part: two girls with their faces pressed together, tongues out and begging for my seed. Quite easily the most voluminous dam of jissom I've ever let the levies break. It was like gentrifying an innocent and rather bland motel room wall. I like to believe my contribution only added character to an otherwise aesthetically unpleasant design.
