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I have to somehow get in shape while being lazy. No gym.

xxsicknessxx

Bluelighter
Joined
Jun 26, 2008
Messages
882
Very simple
What directions, or where should I head to learn to get in shape? I read stuff, I watch you tube, I print up work out routines but just walking doesn't show results so I'm thinking I got two five pounds weights and I'm very weak mucle my skeleton muscle is near below normal. So I'm coming from I work as waiter twice week. That's about all I do dishes every day.

I don't have a car, I don't like to go outside... Ok so I was just going to lift weights in all directions until my arms on soar and maybe that'll end up with me looking like the rock. I'm kidding m but seriously any advise. I also should say I feel like I know all the information in my mind but it's like I don't understand yet. Things have not clicked for me yet. For sure this dont make sense.

Like if I do 200 dumb Bell curls a day can't that help?
 

0.o_LaCuNa_o.0

Moderator: P&S
Staff member
Joined
Sep 14, 2021
Messages
618
Two 5 pound weights are not enough to do a full body workout.

When you say you have to get into shape, do you mean you gotta lose weight, or is it just about gaining some muscle?

Also are you on any substances?
 

Jerry Atrick

Moderator: TDS
Staff member
Joined
Oct 25, 2009
Messages
1,061
Location
here
Very simple
What directions, or where should I head to learn to get in shape? I read stuff, I watch you tube, I print up work out routines but just walking doesn't show results so I'm thinking I got two five pounds weights and I'm very weak mucle my skeleton muscle is near below normal. So I'm coming from I work as waiter twice week. That's about all I do dishes every day.

I don't have a car, I don't like to go outside... Ok so I was just going to lift weights in all directions until my arms on soar and maybe that'll end up with me looking like the rock. I'm kidding m but seriously any advise. I also should say I feel like I know all the information in my mind but it's like I don't understand yet. Things have not clicked for me yet. For sure this dont make sense.

Like if I do 200 dumb Bell curls a day can't that help?
I've never searched youtube for workout instruction but I imagine there are plenty, if not too many, videos to look at. The age old adage of weightlifting goes as follows: If you want to gain weight, lift heavy weights with low reps. If you want to lose weight, lift light weights with high reps. According to your post you want to put on muscle. I was an athlete in high school and lifted weights with the football team all four years. I was a walk on athlete in college for one year and lifted tons of weights there as well.

Here's the kicker, since you do not have a lot of experience lifting weights, anyone who is a trainer would recommend starting off with light weights and high reps. That is just so you can learn what it feels like to lift and gain muscle memory. I know you want to gain muscle but a walk of a thousand miles starts with a single step. Start with your 5 pound weights and I recommend breaking up workouts to lift 3 days a week. Let's say Monday, Wednesday, and Friday.

On Monday, let's focus on chest, triceps, and shoulders. Do pushups. As many as you can at once, essentially to failure. Focus on form and posture. Hands shoulder width apart, back straight. If you have bad form or posture on any exercises, not only is it a waste of time but you can also injure yourself. Do you have a weight bench? Or just the dumbbells? I'd look on craigslist or facebook marketplace and try to find a simple padded bench that can be adjusted to different angles for back support. After you do pushups, use the dumb bells to do bench press. Since the weights are light, you should easily be able to do like 20 or 30 reps or to muscle failure. I'd say doing 4 sets of 20-30 reps should get you a little sore, which is a good thing. Do some Butterflies, which is when you lay flat on you back and extend your arms straight out to the sides and bring your hands together with the dumb bells in your hands while keeping your arms straight. It's another chest exercise. To focus on shoulders (an important muscle for carrying trays as a waiter) adjust the bench to a 90 degree angle so you are sitting upright but with back support. You can now do what's called Military Press. Check youtube for technique. After 4 sets of 20, you can switch to tricep exercises. Check youtube for Bent Over Tricep Extensions and then Skull Crushers, 4 sets of 20 each.

On Wednesday, this is back and biceps day. Not much I can think of for back with just dumb bells but you can do Bent Over Rows to work your lats. You can also do Upright Rows to work your traps. To work the biggest back muscles, it would help if you had a chin up bar. And I'm sure youtube has tons of videos on different types of curls. Also remember that most back exercises also workout the biceps as well. We used to make fun of people who only did "beach workouts." You can tell when someone only does curls and nothing else as they think they look good on the beach.

Friday is leg day. Two 5 pound dumb bells is not much weight to work the legs but I'm sure you can still get a good burn. Try doing Dumbbell Squats and Dumbbell Lunges. Like I said earlier, focus on form and posture. You want to feel muscle burn but don't want to injure a knee or your lower back.

The Monday, Wednesday, Friday thing does not have to be set in stone. If you wait tables two days a week, maybe try to avoid chest, tri, shoulders day the day before you work. Or if you find the weights are light enough to not make you too sore the next day, then do whatever you want. Like I stated earlier, since you want to gain muscle, after two or three weeks of this workout, you may find yourself wanting to upgrade and increase your weight. This should be done and when you do increase weight, you can decrease your reps accordingly. You goal is to lift weights heavy enough that you can only do 4 to 6 reps before muscle failure. But by the time you get there, you may want to lift with a spotter to prevent accidental injury.
 

G_Chem

Bluelighter
Joined
Apr 17, 2015
Messages
4,216
Try keto diet, it's really good at burning off stubborn bodyfat!

Just wanted to add that Keto diet is really only beneficial for overweight males. I know in this case it likely applies but for anyone else reading Keto isn’t ideal for any group of people beyond those individuals.

For people trying to build muscle, I recommend against Keto.


At OP, 5lb is better than nothing. With those 5lb, do the following…. Each to EXHAUSTION, since 5lb is so low you’ll want to go til you cant.

-Bicep Curls
-Tricep Extensions
-Shoulder Flies, extended arm, sides, front and back
-Side Body Rows
-Overhead Press
-Forearm Curls

And soon as you can buy bigger weights slowly buy larger dumbbells, 10’s and 15’s would be great for you.

-GC
 

plumbus-nine

Bluelighter
Joined
Apr 4, 2021
Messages
995
Location
Mexico
Just wanted to add that Keto diet is really only beneficial for overweight males. I know in this case it likely applies but for anyone else reading Keto isn’t ideal for any group of people beyond those individuals.
I have gained some fat around the belly due to morphine wrecking my testosterone level and it's just ugly. I used to be a pretty lean person, not much muscle but I could do 20-30 pushups without training. I'm 80-85kg (no scale here currently) and should be 65-70kg. Does this count as overweight? Somehow this belly fat is the main motivation to exercise, I'm lazy unfortunately but in other times I was swimming every 2-3 days or running etc. but nowadays I don't manage anything. I'm getting off the morphine, hopefully the T level will normalize with time but guess the belly won't magically disappear but requires hard work ...thought about supplementing T, it's even OTC here but too expensive.
 

6am-64-14m

Bluelight Crew
Joined
Mar 18, 2018
Messages
8,975
Location
Onda Cona
Just get some super hot cant get enough (for a week or so) and thrash about madly only feeding off each other?
 

G_Chem

Bluelighter
Joined
Apr 17, 2015
Messages
4,216
I agree about the building muscle part however keto isn't just for overweight males

Example: wanting to get from 12% bodyfat to 8%

I'd have to starve myself to do that eating carbs, especially since I take anti psychotics Haldol and Quetiapine

Much easier with keto

Im a huge believer in cutting carbs and the way I eat is pretty low on the carbs too. I just think aiming for ketosis is too far and detrimental for most body types. It’s not sustainable and goes against our body’s natural systems IMO.

I like Paleo and Whole30 cuz bad carbs are reduced from standard diets, but not completely as we still need some. And with Whole30 it’s more about learning new habits and ways of eating at a slow pace, which I think we can all agree slow and steady is usually the way.

Keto seems to intense, and all or none. Good for losing for overweight males, but overweight females it’s not good as it fucks up hormones. All the research was done on overweight males. Kisspeptin, a neuropeptide that effects hormones gets messed with, women are more sensitive to this then men and sex drive will drop along with abnormalities in menstrual cycles.

I feel any overly intensive diet that tries to override our natural metabolism is just not the way to go. But diet is debated more than most topics…

-GC
 

G_Chem

Bluelighter
Joined
Apr 17, 2015
Messages
4,216
I have gained some fat around the belly due to morphine wrecking my testosterone level and it's just ugly. I used to be a pretty lean person, not much muscle but I could do 20-30 pushups without training. I'm 80-85kg (no scale here currently) and should be 65-70kg. Does this count as overweight? Somehow this belly fat is the main motivation to exercise, I'm lazy unfortunately but in other times I was swimming every 2-3 days or running etc. but nowadays I don't manage anything. I'm getting off the morphine, hopefully the T level will normalize with time but guess the belly won't magically disappear but requires hard work ...thought about supplementing T, it's even OTC here but too expensive.

I got fairly high T despite having many things going against me based on the research (including daily opiate use since 17 or so), I believe it’s due to diet and exercise. You don’t need to supplement T if you don’t want, but it is hard work.

Definitely get off the morphine, buprenorphine effects T too but not as badly if that helps. I use buprenorphine these days.

Remember too you gotta build muscle to lose the fat, so first you’ll get bigger before you really burn it off. Cardio burns it off fast but comes back fast unless you have a base of muscle to keep metabolism high. That’s why you’ll see even many weight loss programs aimed at women pushing this ideology these days, saw a commercial recently for a new one “MBF, muscle burns fat.” Women used to hate the idea of bulking up sticking with mostly cardio but more and more are figuring it out that a light muscular base keeps the fat away while simultaneously building the glutes which we all love :)

-GC
 
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