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Rolling in Toronto

SpaceCookies

SpaceCookies

Bluelighter
Joined
Aug 16, 2022
Messages
33
Hi all Torontonians,
I'm a single 53 year old white guy in Toronto (Scarborough) and I'm looking to use MDMA for the first time. Problem is, I don't have anyone to do it with. I live alone and I don't have a lot of friends who are open to this sort of thing. I'm wondering if there is a group or even an individual who would like to join me on this trip?

From reviewing this forum I understand that ecstasy isn't really something you'd want to do alone, and quite honestly I think I'd be a bit too apprehensive to be by myself the first time.
So why do I even want to try it? I have depression that won't go. Its not disabling, I hold a job and function normally day-to-day but I've been reading that micro-dosing MDMA or LSD can make a difference. It could be a positive experience that may alter the way one sees the world, a chance to get over my ego and have a different outlook. Before someone suggests I see a therapist and try this under medical supervision, I've looked into it and there are 2 obstacles: finding a therapist that will engage in this type of therapy, and when I have found one the cost is prohibitive.

I've ordered some MDMA off the darkweb and will have it tested to see what it's actually made of before ingesting and then I'd like to pick a weekend and roll with it.
Is anyone is else in the same predicament as me? If so I'm calling out to you. Preferably you'll be close to my age and, if you've tried ecstasy before, even better. Please respond to this thread if you have any comments or ideas. PM me if you're interested in tripping out on a summer weekend.
 
Welcome to BL!

I am no expert on therapeutic applications of psychedelics, although I'm pretty sure Ketamine is more applicable to regular/chronic depression than MDMA. MDMA is more indicated in PTSD or other issues. MDMA can actually worsen depression, at least when used in a recreational manner outside of therapy. You probably should have a tripsitter with MDMA, but ketamine is a bit more friendly in this manner.

Alas, I am not trying to discourage you from your endeavour. I'm not sure of the legality of Ketamine therapy in Canada, but in the states it's around $500 per session, typically 2-3 sessions are done.

Do you have any sort of experience with psychedelics at all?

Nurse Ratched said:
Don't want to burst your bubble but asking to meet a random stranger on here to do drugs with is not in your best interest,

All sorts of things can go wrong.
Click to expand...
Precisely what I was about to say next.

While meeting up with people on BL is not necessarily against the rules when done outside of the scope of scoring drugs together, I would take great caution in doing so.

There are a lot of weirdos out there (especially here on Bluelight...), and beyond that doing psychedelic drugs for the first time with a total stranger is going to be awkward and potentially worse in the end. It may even make the experience worse.

I am highly experienced with all manners of psychedelics and I would much prefer to trip alone than with people I don't know, by a large margin.
 
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I strongly recommend going to a rave and doing it there if you want to do it with people.

Do you have any friends who would go with you, even if they aren’t willing to do MDMA?

Also microdosing LSD has mixed results, but microdosing MDMA is a terrible idea that will quickly cause issues for you. MDMA is meant to be taken no more than once every 1-3 months with an initial dose of no more than 120mg and a total of less than 200mg ingested per session.

I suggest starting with a 100mg dose and taking another 40-50mg 90-150 minutes later if desired.
 
Thanks for those responses.
I know there's a lot to consider about this request/venture, and I have thought about it quite a bit.
As mentioned I'm a middle-aged man so going to raves to be around people isn't my scene at all. I think I'd feel like the teacher in the room while the kids are at play. Also, I don't plan on micro-dosing every weekend, this is just a personal experiment to see what may transpire.

I do have experience with LSD from my youth in the 80s, however that was literally 35 years ago. But I was under the impression that MDMA is not a psychedelic, no?

As far as meeting up with just any old stranger from on-line; perhaps I should have been clearer. I don't plan on exchanging a few emails and then meeting up. I'm thinking it would be more of a gradual familiarity before an actual meet. Maybe kind of like Internet dating (although that feels weird to say) - a hello, a few messages, a phone call, a lunch or two, you know? But no, I wouldn't just meet up with 'Chad' at the subway station and then parachute the bomb before going off into the night with him and his twitchy girlfriend. Give me a little "wisdom-credit".

I have no idea if there are other people out there my age who would be willing to experiment this way but I thought I'd put something out there and see what happens. If nothing becomes of it than I'll take the trip alone.
Thanks for your concern and advice.
 
SpaceCookies said:
I'm a middle-aged man so going to raves to be around people isn't my scene at all
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I’ve been to many raves where the median age is 35-40 and some of the organizers were 50-60. You won’t be out of place at your age at most raves.
 
Please tell where are they? Because I don't know any raves where this is the median age in Toronto! Maybe we're behind where-ever you're from but I would really like to know if that exists in Ontario.
Speak up older Ontarians ! are you hiding something!
 
SpaceCookies said:
Please tell where are they? Because I don't know any raves where this is the median age in Toronto! Maybe we're behind where-ever you're from but I would really like to know if that exists in Ontario.
Speak up older Ontarians ! are you hiding something!
Click to expand...
I can't speak for Canada and I haven't been to a dance club or rave in like 20 years. Have you ever been to a dance club and people were handing out flyers on card stock paper with bright colors and an address? IIRC those were distributed outside the club by people advertising a rave. Maybe try going to a dance club that plays techno music. A lot of people are rolling at clubs anyways, at least in my previous experience. I don't know if any of this applies anymore, like I said it's been 20 years.

BTW at least back then you could kind of tell who was rolling at a club. They were the one dancing like a maniac, wearing or waving around glow sticks and glow in the dark shit :tripballs:

But I'm also with the folks who say MDMA might actually worsen the depression, at least during the come down. When I used to come down, for some reason I'd get very depressed and even feel guilt for some reason. I'd smoke a ton of weed to counteract this effect.
 
@Jerry Atrick Many raves still hand out a few flyers and/or put some up on street poles. But these days, generally even the older organizers are all primarily advertising events online via mailing lists, Facebook, Instagram, etcetera.
 
arrall said:
I’ve been to many raves where the median age is 35-40 and some of the organizers were 50-60. You won’t be out of place at your age at most raves.
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I can confirm, I'm one of the 40 year Olds you may run into. Going to one Saturday.
Be careful meeting strangers online.
Go to Kensington market or along queen west. People are friendly and there's weed cafés and bars to meet people.
 
Hi Jenn, Thanks for your input. 40 is still young enough to pass for 'youth', especially if you're young looking to begin with. Enjoy it while you can! I sure did.
I'm mid-50s now with thinning hair and growing waistline and If my daughter is any indication I would expect my presence at raves to be resented by the younger people (who's the old fart who thinks he's still 20-something). For perspective, imagine yourself going to a high school hang-out and expecting to meet and interact with the kids. You could, but it would be more of a 'distanced' formal construct. That's just the inter-generational norm. Which is why I was putting feelers out there for people my own age.

I understand what you're saying about Queen west / Kensington. I've been there many times but I can honestly say that I have never spontaneously met people who I would then know and hang-out with. Those cafes and bars can be kind of clique-ee and probably just as dangerous as Internet mixing. Meeting people on-line is normal these days, think of all the dating and hobbying sites, they're setup for safety but eventually you'll trust and meet-up. However I know of no on-line site that would introduce fellow day-trippers. Anyone know of any?
 
True I guess. I just get a better feel for someone in person then online. I don't really look my age and when Rolling I'm super outgoing and being female helps for sparking up conversation.
I don't know for any sites. I just got a text last night inviting me to go.

Ever think of a dating site looking for a girl to party with? When I was on tinder I saw tons of men looking for a ski partner.
 
The problem with dating sites is that it implies you are looking for romance. I'm not, and its somewhat less than honest to approach women with alternative intentions.
 
theres at least one organizer i know of in Toronto that throws parties that are definitely suited for (y)our age (though admittedly I am a bit younger). You definitely wouldnt stand out at these events lol... just saw some photos of the festival they threw (I had to sell my ticket) and there were lots of "old" people lol
 
SpaceCookies said:
Hi Jenn, Thanks for your input. 40 is still young enough to pass for 'youth', especially if you're young looking to begin with. Enjoy it while you can! I sure did.
I'm mid-50s now with thinning hair and growing waistline and If my daughter is any indication I would expect my presence at raves to be resented by the younger people (who's the old fart who thinks he's still 20-something). For perspective, imagine yourself going to a high school hang-out and expecting to meet and interact with the kids. You could, but it would be more of a 'distanced' formal construct. That's just the inter-generational norm. Which is why I was putting feelers out there for people my own age.

I understand what you're saying about Queen west / Kensington. I've been there many times but I can honestly say that I have never spontaneously met people who I would then know and hang-out with. Those cafes and bars can be kind of clique-ee and probably just as dangerous as Internet mixing. Meeting people on-line is normal these days, think of all the dating and hobbying sites, they're setup for safety but eventually you'll trust and meet-up. However I know of no on-line site that would introduce fellow day-trippers. Anyone know of any?
Click to expand...
I've tried advertising on dating apps for ladies that like mdma and/or psychedelics but I always come up blank. Plus then you've got to let it be known that you keep a supply of both.

In an ideal world this would attract a certain kind of woman, but sometimes I feel like I might as well advertise a star trek convention as advertise mdma in a dating app.
 
Easier for women then. If I'm ever in a city where I don't know anyone I use online to find some. Always worked for me.
 
tired of crap said:
theres at least one organizer i know of in Toronto that throws parties that are definitely suited for (y)our age (though admittedly I am a bit younger). You definitely wouldnt stand out at these events lol... just saw some photos of the festival they threw (I had to sell my ticket) and there were lots of "old" people lol
Click to expand...
So who or where is this organizer ? Or least give me a clue where to look.
 
Jennn said:
Easier for women then. If I'm ever in a city where I don't know anyone I use online to find some. Always worked for me.
Click to expand...
yep, young looking women definitely have it easier this way.

I always remember my 20 something woman friend telling me how easy it is to meet friendly people at her new condo. All I could think was "yeah sure, a hot young chick as opposed to an older dude where the people are like 'just don't make eye contact' " Its kind of funny.

Don't get me wrong Jennn, I'm not a bitter hideous old ogre, I enjoy being my age now and truthfully I don't have a lot in common with people who are decades younger than me anyway. Problem is all my friends 'grew-up' and have no interest in experimenting with MDMA now.

So hey, if you ever go to one of these events that 'tired of crap' mentioned, and you see a 6'1" blond 50 something dude in a hawaiian shirt ask him if he's ever had Space Cookies.
 
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