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The rules of a threesome!

SIM-1

SIM-1

Bluelighter
Joined
Dec 2, 2004
Messages
1,037
Okay, after reading all the threesome posts this forum has to offer, SLM mentioned something about "rules" when it actually does happen. Somehow, I think that that would probably be a good way to go about having a threesome. So, my question is (cos i'll probably never do it) , If you are going to have a threesome ..... What would the rules be?? would it be one sided...??

And for people who do have these succsesful threesomes....What r ur rules then?? (i.e. You cant come in her, It has to be me!)..That's just an example...

I'd love to know. =D
 
hmmm...

I've never been involved in a 3some while married or with a s.o, only as one of 3 singles... and that was FUN! I've had a m/m/f, f/m/f and f/f/f 3some...

I've been thinking about this, and i've come to the conclusion that there would be SO many rules, that it would be way too a clinical experience. That and/or i'd come across as really selfish... here would be my rules.

* He couldn't kiss her
* He couldn't eat her out
* He couldn't show more interest in her than in me
* I would be okay if he had sex with her, but only from behind and while she was eating me out... I wouldn't put up with "1 on 1" kind of sex between them. Nothing that could potentially create a connection between them
* No orgasms through penetration with her
* He can't get a blowjob off her.

So yeah, i don't think it would work out ;) Ideally, she and i would fuck, while he essentially watched, and joined in only slightly. To me though, that's not fair to him, so i'd rather not at all.

My ideal situation would be 2 couples, her and i would fuck while our partners sat back and enjoyed the show, then after we've had some fun, they could join in, but no partner swapping... basically same room sex, with the occasional orgy-like behaviour. My hubby and i are not interested in hetero sex with other people... we love the exhibitionist aspect of same room sex, and he loves the idea of watching me with another woman.

A fun scenario would be me eating out the girl, while she sucks her partners cock and i'm being fucked by hubby. woohoo! :D

...but i'm not fussy. ;) =D
 
Yeah a while ago i had this fantasy of gettin it on with another woman, then, after she'd fliffed me, My boyfriend who'd been sittin in the corner watching us & masturbating would come over & fuck me.. She'd leave...LMAO. Not very fair i know. But he's very against the whole 3some thing. We spoke of it last night again. He's really against sharing. So he lets me watch a bit of lesbain porn & i'm satisfied.

My ideal situation would be 2 couples, her and i would fuck while our partners sat back and enjoyed the show, then after we've had some fun, they could join in, but no partner swapping... basically same room sex, with the occasional orgy-like behaviour. My hubby and i are not interested in hetero sex with other people... we love the exhibitionist aspect of same room sex, and he loves the idea of watching me with another woman.
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That too sounds awesome! I've wanted to have the orgy like situation aswell but with no partner swapping. I like the thought of two couples having sex, & like getting a glimpse of one another with nothing more. Same room sex is probably something i'd do too....
 
Re: hmmm...

samadhi said:

So yeah, i don't think it would work out ;)
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LOL!!

Actually, despite your list of 'don't's', a lot of your ideas sound really horny ;)

Believe it or not - because I'm known as one of the most sexually easygoing people in SLR - my partner and I actually have pretty set rules for swinging/threesomes.

It's ABSOLUTELY necessary to be comfortable in your mind and heart with what's going on, so it's always better to err on the side of caution. And I'm not immune to feeling left out or jealous.

So basically, mine are as follows:

No. 1: My partner orgasms with ME (although he is cool about me orgasming through oral with the other guy - I didn't say these rules are fair ;) hehe)

No. 2: No seperate rooms, ever. One on one with the other partner is okay, as long as we're in the same room and within touching distance.

No. 3: Cuddles have their limit. One thing that really pisses me off is if he sits there for hours snuggled with the other girl and ignores me. A couple of hours, cool... but all night, not on. I need my attention. Because my boyfriend's a cuddly type he forgets this at times but I'm not shy about directly saying "Hey, I want my boy back ;) "

That's it I think. :)

My favourite threesomes are where me and the girl play (extendedly ;) )while the guys watch, and then we swap partners and make out, and do oral etc. until we're really excited and then swap back and finish off with penetrative sex with our own partners. In fact, despite what a lot of people may think we've only gone all the way twice with another couple. I think that's a special and rare gift and should be reserved for very special and rare couples.
 
This is amazing, my friend is about to have a 3some and I explained "the rules" to her. (Over MSN)
Now she wants them in writing, this is what I have so far.
I will amend when I finish

The rules for 2 guys and a girl.
------All parites.
-First of all, sort out your emotions. There is fluid, there is lips and tits and cocks and all sorts of stuff going on, the last thing you want is to throw your heart into the mix. So sort out who you like and who you don't mind getting it on with. Further to that, if you are the "third-wheel" in a 3some, the couple will not break up just cuz you are a better fuck so if you like her -or him, don't use this as an excuse to try to hook up with them.
-It is a one time only, (unless stated) so don't keep trying for a replay. Once you done for the night, you are done. The next time, is another time altogether.
-Be carefull. Unless you know all partied involved have had STD checks and came back clean, be carefull.

------Guys.
-Guys don't like cock. They like their own but only cuz they have been around it for 20 something years and it is just apart of them. Other guys cocks are not theirs. As a result of the fundemental fact, don't touch another guys cock. ESPECIALLY WITH YOURS!!!
It's not cool or funny.
-In fact, don't touch the other guy really.
-Especially not his ass.
-Especially not his ass with your cock. Don't put it in there. (Unless he asks and you like, in which case "why is the girl there??")
-Don't look at the other guy in the eyes. He will not find it romantic.

------Girls
-You have three holes, two cocks. All of them are going to get used, deal with it.
-With that in mind, get an enama, it ain't the bad.
-It ain't over until your done. :p
-Have fun!
 
^ LOL!!!! That's the most fucking hilarious (and true) thing I've ever read. I applaud you *bows down*.

That shit should be written somewhere as some kind of threesome law ... hahaha :D

(oh, except the enema bizzo... I'm not down with anal, so, I must break that law)
 
yeah, i have to agree with the enema bit... You can stick your cock up my arse... but i'm gonna stick a big fat dildo up yours first, kay? ;)

Oh, and i must add that the whole "cock in both ends" thing, is JUST AS AWESOME AS IT SOUNDS! ;)=D ( but i wouldn't know, of course ;))
 
(oh, except the enema bizzo... I'm not down with anal, so, I must break that law)
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Oh strawberry, How disapointing...... LOL. I must say i'm a bit shocked....Anal rules! %)
 
Hehehe.... OMG I'm falling short of expectations! :D Well, I tried it twice with a previous boyfirend (9 years or so ago) and quite liked it; but with my current boyfriend we can't quite get it happening, and maybe it shrunk or something in the 9 years I didn't do it because it bloody hurts :eek: =D ... anyway, I never say never, and would give it a go again ;)
 
Rule for M/M/F 3somes: I've only been in a 3some with 2 guys, who were both bi, and it was fucking great. I probably wouldn't ever have a 3some unless it was with 2 guys who were willing to fuck each other too.

Rule for M/F/F 3somes: If I were to have a 3some with another female, assuming that the male is somebody that I like/am dating, he can't touch her, period. She's mine.
 
First 'rule' we have is that we take the time to communicate what it is that we all want to get out of the experience. Wife and I have been involved in many different sexual dynamics relative to other people in our bed over the years. What 'WE' had to do first is discuss what we wanted and make sure we were comfortable with it, then do the same with the other individual. Since most of ours involve another woman, we normally start with the FF then go from there. It helps to be able to talk about the expectations, but if it gets spontaneous, then we take it as it goes. But can and do explain to the other person what our boundaries are should that particular situation present itself. Everyone involved will appreciate it and no one goes away with hard feelings (pardon the pun).

Our own personal rule, and we really have only one, is that we only perform the 69 position with each other. We decided that everything else was pretty much fair game, but that we would save that one sexual act as our 'own' if it involved doing it with the opposite sex. It is all good with her and another woman, but she dosen't so it with another man, nor I with another woman.
*caveat...my ass is exit only fyi....lol, and am not interested in sex with another man. Understand things will go 'bump' in the night, just as long as they don't go 'hump'. :)

What we got ourselves real comfortable with early on in doing this is the simple fact that; when we do this, it is sex, nothing more. We love each other, the sex with others is simply that. It merely satisfies our fantasy.
 
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judging from the above comments, I'm getting the impression that:
a) 'the rules' are largely a matter of personal preference, and
b) people seem much more concerned with them if they're in a relationship

in fact, it's surprisingly common for single people to have threesoms without rules at all (especially on a drunken whim...8) )
if you're concerned about rules for threesomes, then i can only suggest that you follow sptex's advice and "take the time to communicate what it is that you all want to get out of the experience" before beginning. I would go so far as to say that there aren't any set objective 'threesome rules' which apply for everyone, so decide what matters to YOU first and go from there.
 
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I was in a threesome with a YOUNG married couple. Evidently it was the girl's idea, she really wanted me, and her husband didn't have a problem with it. However, when it came time to do the deed... She asked him what he wanted to do, and he hesitated, and then told her he wanted to do me... I felt really...wrong. I could tell she was very unhappy about that as her vibe totally changed.

They're still together and after 2 years. they still hunt me down to ask if I'll do it with them again. 3 somes are NOT for me...and they are not for everyone. It takes a very secure couple and or person in general to be able to watch their partner put their members in another girl... I know I would never be able to have one myself with my S/O
 
Good thread!

I am just slightly perplexed by x2shy's rules for two boys, one girl threesome. I know this is one of my fantasies and personally I would not want to be intimate with two guys at the same time if they were homophobic like that and afraid to touch the other guy at all. It just wouldn't seem as natural, nor as fun. I think it would be hot if they made out with each other also. As for the DP...I think it would be more fun to be sucking one guy off, while the other one is doing me from behind! Woo!! :p
 
I don't think I've had a strong set of rules that have applied to every threesome I've been in. Apart from the "respect eachother, and stop means stop" rule. But that's standard even in twosomes... and uh, I guess onesomes.

I think that the 'rules' thing depends a lot on the people you're with. A couple for instance, generally have a set of rules for themselves, and then an additional set of rules for a third member. These, I've found, have been made on a case-by-case basis since the role of a 'third person' can vary (eg a couple and an extra, or three single people, or whatever). Ususally these rules mark out a set of territorial boundaries that each person cannot cross with another.

With three-way relationships, I've found that the rules are FAR more complex, since so many people are scared of the big J-word: Jealousy. which is retarded, but well-founded. To be quite honest, I pretty much broke all the 'rules' I've had to submit to for three-way relationships in the past. I guess that's why there's only one other person in my bed when i got to sleep at night now. Oh well, who cares. Rules, just like hearts, are made to be broken.
 
Sorry, shouldn't post half drunk.
This was all for a friend that wanted to do 2 guys. Hence it is geared for the M/M/F crowd.
Second of all, I was warning her of "worst case" and on top of all of that, it purely my view of the rules and I completely understand if these don't apply to everyone/anyone. As many ppl have said, it's a case by case basis.
I still think they are funny to read.
 
I've been in threesomes,only 2 came out okay, ironically that was with 2 of the same or opposite sex. None of the girl,guy,girl threesomes worked out(only been in 4)! There was just too much akwardness or jealousy afterwards.

I refuse to enter into a threesome with a COUPLE.. specially if one is good friends with me, or I know both of them real well. This NEVER WORKS. Someone always ends up feeling left out, or 2nd best in 2 girls/ 1 guy threesomes, especially if 2 are hooked up.

The other 2 can be girl/guy or girl/girl, but no one must be coupled up or dating or interested in looking to date that one person.

Usually I don't like us to be intoxicated with anything.. while altho it makes it for a fun night, people use this as an excuse for doing it and that's stupid!

All persons must be 100% sure and fully consent and not be pressured into it.
 
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