Positive The Tapering Supportive/Social Thread

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Bluelighter
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I feel terrible like I might die. Lol. Not soon enough. I think it's the sugar really.
Sory if this is tds. I always have trouble finding where this thread is all of the time. It's close to health and recovery. I would have never ever had taken drugs obsessively because of BL and I feel safe being here. Because it's fact of truth. : ) ♡
And all the facts of everything about xanax are true. I am glad harm reduction of opioids made me aware about being safe with the dosages. thanx for helping so much.
Doctors are all paranoid now too.
Opioids are a great cough suppressant if not allergic to this medication. 👍🏼💙
I am ambulatory and go for long walks allot everyday. For my dog but helps to be outside too. I still struggle everyday. Sometimes I do good. I still am working and have a job. I try to heal everyday. I have had to pray for strength always as much as possible. As the years went by I am being helped so much too.
♡🕊
To find peace within yourself is a great achievement even if it can't be sustained all the time. :need drugs:
 

Iceman1216

Bluelighter
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Weed only helps me to pass time and sleep. Time moves like molasses in withdrawal, so anything that helps it move more quickly is a blessing. Sleep is instantly a luxury that is in very short supply, and time spent staring at the ceiling in the middle of the night is the worst. THC gummies are my new best friend. They help me relax and sleep. Not great but anything is better than what I was getting before.
Me too!! I am still on my Norco's 20-30mgs per day. But increased pain is moving in or maybe That Deeded Tolerance??
Who the fuck knows?? I am a cancer survivor who under went a large amount of Chemo & radiation 13 years ago, and am Alive ( as my oncologist reminds me!! 😇.
I am 60 now and as they all say " Getting older is Not for Sissy's"
I have this fantasy, if I stop opiates,gabipentin,THC gummies , I will be fine?? What a joke, really, all I will have is the pain!!
I have been sober a long time, with a very relapse over 38 years ( always Worst than the time before when I needed to stop!!
" If it was Bad when you Stopped, Starting will Not make it better"
Thanks @Squeaky , your honest posts have helped me greatly!
 

Iceman1216

Bluelighter
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BTW: The new part time pharmacist, in the only drug store in my small town , has questioned my Norco prescription??
"1-2 3xs per day as needed for pain" No more than 6 per day. So as any good addict in pain I did the math 100 divided by 6 and went in after 18 days for a refill?
I am just amazed about the Balls of a pharmacist, questioning a Dr's script that I have had for 10 years?? WTF//
 

Jabberwocky

Frumious Bandersnatch
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BTW: The new part time pharmacist, in the only drug store in my small town , has questioned my Norco prescription??
"1-2 3xs per day as needed for pain" No more than 6 per day. So as any good addict in pain I did the math 100 divided by 6 and went in after 18 days for a refill?
I am just amazed about the Balls of a pharmacist, questioning a Dr's script that I have had for 10 years?? WTF//
Nah, i don't think that it is about balls.

He is new, enthusiastic, and maybe feeling too important about himself right now. Don't let that irritate you.
 

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Bluelighter
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BTW: The new part time pharmacist, in the only drug store in my small town , has questioned my Norco prescription??
"1-2 3xs per day as needed for pain" No more than 6 per day. So as any good addict in pain I did the math 100 divided by 6 and went in after 18 days for a refill?
I am just amazed about the Balls of a pharmacist, questioning a Dr's script that I have had for 10 years?? WTF//
At least a pharmacist knows their chemistry, I was once told by a nosey doctor's receptionist that I shouldn't take what the doctor prescribed, she informed me that lots of people think they need those medicines when they don't at all. Um, right, I think I'll take your boss's advice since she's a doctor and all.
 

Squeaky

Bluelighter
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Me too!! I am still on my Norco's 20-30mgs per day. But increased pain is moving in or maybe That Deeded Tolerance??
Who the fuck knows?? I am a cancer survivor who under went a large amount of Chemo & radiation 13 years ago, and am Alive ( as my oncologist reminds me!! 😇.
I am 60 now and as they all say " Getting older is Not for Sissy's"
I have this fantasy, if I stop opiates,gabipentin,THC gummies , I will be fine?? What a joke, really, all I will have is the pain!!
I have been sober a long time, with a very relapse over 38 years ( always Worst than the time before when I needed to stop!!
" If it was Bad when you Stopped, Starting will Not make it better"
Thanks @Squeaky , your honest posts have helped me greatly!
I had a pharmacist actually call my Dr once and grill her about my prescription..... a week after major back surgery.
I don’t take my business to that establishment anymore. I know they have a legal responsibility to verify the validity of a huge prescription like mine but I’m lucky to be in a big city with pharmacies on every other corner. When I don’t like the service I can just go somewhere else. The judgement is not part of their job.
 

Squeaky

Bluelighter
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Thanks @Squeaky , your honest posts have helped me greatly!
I’m really happy my journey has helped you.

Part of my goal with the candid posts was to save someone, anyone else from the fear that sets in during withdrawal. I can’t imagine how desperate it would feel to be 4 days into opiate wd, suffering miserably, and having no idea when it’s going to get better. I can totally understand how people switch to street drugs when the Dr cuts off their prescription, and it doesn’t have to go that way.
 

endlessnameless

Bluelighter
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I am really going through a bout of depression. It really hurts so bad it is physical pain from being that depressed. I still fight it and stay outside allot and hike big trails with my dog or dogs. I try to work and sstay busy. Then it hits hard real bad. It's because everything went wrong. Low doses help because of what can't.

When it comes down to straight up depression, I'm gonna say whatever helps - go for it, because were I to say anything contrary I'd be nothing short of a hypocrite, For context, I was depressed from 13 right on up until I hit 23 and ventured into opioids after at least 6 years giving every anti-depressant (lithium included) offered to me its longest chance possible.

At the same time - though its likely to come across as hypocritical - put the opiates down if you haven't already started. I'm just about getting close to normality after one of the most dragged out detoxes ever, and since my motivation is still nearing nill, I haven't been able to read all of your posts yet but from what I've read you're venturing outside with your dog/dogs and going on hikes? IDEAL for your situation. Keep that up, because the exercise will likely kick-start the endorphin production you need to get over that depressive slump.
 

birdup

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I don't know if this is helpful or not, but I've been a heroin addict and a meth addict and an alcoholic. I went to rehab (at least once) for all three.

I highly recommend trying timelock boxes if you want to wean.

It has always been a struggle for me, because it's so easy when you're down to say "fuck it" and do the wrong thing.

I recommend (if you can afford it) to get a timelock box.

Don't lock that shit down for 24 hours. Don't be silly about it. Lock it down for an amount of time that makes sense to you. Then slightly extend it, and so on.

I run my life by time-lock boxes now.

Rehab costs thousands. Drugs cost more than money.

Time-lock boxes are pretty cheap. For me, they were/are invaluable.

I'm not going to advertise brand names.

Just trying to help.
 

Squeaky

Bluelighter
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I don't know if this is helpful or not, but I've been a heroin addict and a meth addict and an alcoholic. I went to rehab (at least once) for all three.

I highly recommend trying timelock boxes if you want to wean.

It has always been a struggle for me, because it's so easy when you're down to say "fuck it" and do the wrong thing.

I recommend (if you can afford it) to get a timelock box.

Don't lock that shit down for 24 hours. Don't be silly about it. Lock it down for an amount of time that makes sense to you. Then slightly extend it, and so on.

I run my life by time-lock boxes now.

Rehab costs thousands. Drugs cost more than money.

Time-lock boxes are pretty cheap. For me, they were/are invaluable.

I'm not going to advertise brand names.

Just trying to help.
I considered one of those time-lock boxes. Amazon has a couple for under $100. I kept telling myself it would be a bad idea because “what if I have an emergency?”. The whole point of having a huge pile of pills is to be able to use as much as I need whenever I need it, right?

Basically I chose to NOT lock up my pills so that I would not be without them in times of legitimate pain. Instead, I would overuse my script and be completely out of pills when I really needed them with no time-lock alarm to provide relief in a couple of hours. The irony is that if I had done what you suggested..... I would have exactly what I was trying to protect by not doing what you suggested.
 

Squeaky

Bluelighter
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nodded about seven times. can't write yet. ohh.
Endlessnameless is 100% correct. Sunshine and exercise are huge for getting past the depression. Not only do they both trigger the endorphins you need, they eat up time. For me, time is my biggest enemy when I’m battling depression. It doesn’t matter if it’s opiate wd’s or just the stress of life (I have been on anti-depressants and anti-psychotics too, long before my trip down oxy lane). Ironically when I really feel low and I really just want to stay in bed all day, the absolute best thing I can do is get up and go outside and do something productive like washing the car. Best if I can avoid people, but definitely best to be busy doing anything outdoors.
 

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Bluelighter
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Now I am really going through a bout of depression. It really hurts so bad it is physical pain from being that depressed. I still fight it and stay outside allot and hike big trails with my dog or dogs. I try to work and stay busy. Then it hits hard real bad. It's because everything went wrong. Low doses help because of what can't.
Depression sucks big time, sometimes it's enough that you got through the entire day and now you can go back to bed.
Doing very little and just existing is not only peaceful, it's a hell of a lot better for the planet than jetting around the world being important, there's always that!
 

Squeaky

Bluelighter
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I can’t remember if I posted this before or not......

The worst idea I ever had was a tapering plan where I broke my tiny oxy pills into quarters. Prescribed 3 pills per day = 12 quarter pills. Roughly 18 hours awake means a dose every 90 minutes to start. The plan was to stretch that 90 minutes to two hours, then 3 hours, etc.

I made it work but after about a week I was worse off than I had ever been. I had totally missed the fact that I created a situation where the level of oxycodone in my blood was so consistent that I was even more addicted than when I took two whole pills 4x per day. I was in perpetual wd for most of the day AND I literally spent my whole day watching the clock in anticipation of my next sliver of a pill. I had artificially created a time release oxycodone pill.

Fast forward to now. There’s a new show/docuseries out called “Dopesick”. There’s only 3 episodes so far but it’s all about Perdue Pharma and their invention of a 12 hour time release oxy pill. They claimed that it was less addictive because it kept the level of medicine in your blood at a lower level. In the end it actually was more addictive because it kept that level of medicine in your blood from ever dropping to zero, even at night.

The take away for me is this: In order to quit you need a break from the drugs. You have no choice but to deal with the wd’s but you can choose to experience them all at once (cold turkey) or in smaller pieces (tapering). The best tapering plan starts with a schedule that includes no more than 3 or 4 doses per day and it has to be strictly followed.

A time lock safe is an awesome plan and the money spent on the safe will be money not spent on the pursuit of drugs. The only problem with it would be that you have no relief coming if you’re actually in pain. Having someone hold your pills works great but who wants to be responsible for an addict and their dope. And working with your Dr might mean something like suboxone where you’re still addicted..... forever.

The only thing that ever really worked for me was cold turkey with something like loperamide or Kratom to help manage the wd’s. As long as it’s something I don’t like. Scalding hot showers, good food, exercise, Netfix, mostly all help to pass the time and give me little targets to hit throughout the day. Sex helps if you’re up for it.

But there’s no real trick to it. If you’re going to have 100 hours of withdrawals then you have 100 hours of withdrawals. The only real decision is if you’re going to do it all at once or in little pieces over time. Most of the ‘tricks’ will decrease the severity and inversely multiply the duration. The bitch of it is that we are all being misled by the medical community into thinking there is a way out without any suffering.
 

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Bluelighter
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I don't think I'm ever going to be able to do withdrawal again, like squeaky says it has to be done or it becomes perpetual. I don't feel I'll ever be able to do it, even far in the future, I think I'm stuck on this side of that particular barrier, I should sleep.
 

birdup

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@Squeaky

These boxes won't work for every situation, but you can break them open in case of emergencies / desperation. My box is made of plastic. It's not a safe. No time-lock that is commercially available is impenetrable that I'm aware of.

I don't ever need pills. Drugs are non essential and entirely recreational for me. I have an extremely painful neurological condition - trigeminal neuralgia - but I don't medicate (and traditional pain killers that get you high are ineffective anyway).
 

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Bluelighter
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@hylite You're never going to taper much when you don't intend it to be forever. I mean who chooses to go through that only to go straight back into using more once the taper is finished?
Oh, yeah, that's me, lol, maybe that's all of us.
 

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Bluelighter
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I feel a bit crap because the people we were with last night were people I'd told. I'd been so confident (in the summer) that I had it under control that I told them what a junkie I used to be, but no more, here is the brand new me 😁
So that's a great way to make a fool of yourself if anyone is looking for tips 🙄
 

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Bluelighter
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Sorry, I'll go take my doom and gloom elsewhere. I'm much better at cheering on others in their tapering attempts once I'm fixed myself, I'm that much of a fucking hypocrite.
 

Squeaky

Bluelighter
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I feel a bit crap because the people we were with last night were people I'd told. I'd been so confident (in the summer) that I had it under control that I told them what a junkie I used to be, but no more, here is the brand new me 😁
So that's a great way to make a fool of yourself if anyone is looking for tips 🙄
Been there.... done that.... got the t-shirt, the hat, and the dents in my car to prove it!
 

Squeaky

Bluelighter
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Sorry, I'll go take my doom and gloom elsewhere. I'm much better at cheering on others in their tapering attempts once I'm fixed myself, I'm that much of a fucking hypocrite.
If you’re a hypocrite then we all are. To be a hypocrite only means you expect more from others than you do from yourself in the exact same situation. So far I don’t see you judging anybody on BL for having problems like yours.....
 
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