• HEALTH & RECOVERY
    Welcome Guest
    Posting Rules Bluelight Rules Thread Directory 1 Thread Directory 2
    Mindfulness Links Addiction & Mind
    Sober Living Partner Program (SLiPP)
  • H&R Moderators: VerbalTruist | cdin | Lil'LinaptkSix

Recovery ⫸⫸ THE RECOVERY THREAD 2021 ⫷⫷

Status
Not open for further replies.
So given the rash knuckles, I've may had Staph infection.. and the bruises like went away almost 48hrs ago, just some unnoticeable dots and the left finger still a bit but the right almost clear.. i think this shit deeed bc he met the Augmentin infrastructure.
 
hylite said:
Self-Kindness

May I be kind to myself.
May I accept myself just as I am.

For the last two phrases, use whatever words speak to your particular situation, such as:

May I be safe.
May I forgive myself
May I be happy and free from suffering
May I safely endure this pain
May I find peace in my heart
May I be strong
May I protect myself
May I learn to live with ease and well being
May I accept the circumstances of my life
May we learn to live together in peace
Click to expand...
all that was beautiful and choked me up, ty ty
 
3 pills left and this shit size of a quail egg but I guess is will draw back given I've killed the Spy! Shit crazy never thought that i will experience this but makes you wonder what else is out there..
 
feel like utter crap today.

some family shit going on, my cat is still weeing inside despite his clean bill of health and cat valium, had a big argument with my boyf about it last night cos he was just not helping me at all, i'm fucking exhausted. tried going for a run to make myself feel better and just got a splitting headache.

had a decent enough day yesterday, did some volunteering and then saw some friends. got home, all was going fine, til a completely preventable cat pee incident that was entirely down to my boyf being lazy and unhelpful.
 
I am so pissed at MYSELF. I can't do anything. If I don't take a pill. ANYTHING.
And now I am hooked, or dependent I guess would be a better term, on Energy drinks.
The most latest crippling situation.

If I don't have them. Life won't work for anything at all.

It's a slow demise right now. Imho.

I am so angry and scorned at by life. Is how I feel exactly now.

And I have no where to go except to move forward. With that empowerment that will be so very important for this journey ahead.

I am not really trying to do drugs. Or and anymore.

Seriously, I am giving it a try at quitting.
Part of my life has been really tattered too with help of drug use along the way.

I just feel angry. I mean my brain won't function and I get so physically sick.
I mean it's not even that much. But it is EVERYDAY.
 
Maybe he has hyperthyredoism, is the ADHD of the animals. Anywayy TODAY tomorrow what diff does it make, last treatment day.. a bit anxious the unknown, is gonna draw back and remember y'all, If and if you ever encounter this lovecraftian infliction remember to know that you may not have a salivary stone because it comes and goes — like money. Stones stay there until the incision process, swollen and hard at touch, like a snail shell
 
I’m writing this from rehab. Checked myself in on November 8th with help from some friends and my wife. 25 years of partying, 20 year benzo habit.

Booze was starting to be a 24/7 thing and I was hiding it. Not good.

Detox was hell. They full on stopped my benzos without a taper. Put me on phenabarb and gabapentin. Shit got super scary and I broke down and cried for a benzo taper. Thankfully got one but it was too quick. Now I’m on a maintenance dose of .5 mg’s of clonazopan at night along with lexepro and buspar. Overall I’m happy with my progress. 26 days with no Xanax and no booze. My benzo does has been more than cut in half. If I have to take the .5 clonazopan forever I honestly don’t care. My panic disorder is very real and I can’t believe they didn’t taper me. I told them I would have never agreed to come to treatment had I known that would be the case.

Anyway, I’ll be out of here in a week and a half and plan to do 6 weeks of IOP and get back into AA and NA Feeling much better and I’m excited to be sober. I’m 42 and I’ve had my fun. Booze is fucking toxic.

I feel so lucky to have such a supportive wife, family and friends. Cheers to all of you who are struggling. Addiction is a real bitch.
 
@ChickenScratch

Congrats, dude.

You've taken a huge step forward.

I’m 42 and I’ve had my fun.
Click to expand...

Yeah I've been feeling the same way, recently.

My wild days are coming to an end and I'm okay with that.

<3

Good luck.
 
So I've finished my course of Augmentin 875/125 ( 2 packs ), first day without'em I feel ok, I've had a good sleep today, maybe later I will eat something maybe along the lines of a sandwich and a kefir since I don't feel like being hungry but having something down there, I've also had a lemon yesterday. My nose a bit runny just a tiny somehow I dunno maybe because is December and my mind being foggy as for rn, I remember winter season makes me a bit dormilone ( sleepy ) it stops after a while but meh anyhow only that. I've woken up perfectly ok, without any discomforts
 
yesterday my nose was not runny but it was a fall, i literally had that fall for like some good almost 10hrs and today only wet, i feel the mucus and stuff but it doesn't catch legs like yesterday. I've read online that this is a defense mechanism of the human body aganist pathogens he detects as. The so called ''T/B'' cells. Only that, but as for me am all dandy
 
a bit obscure is that my skin kinda cave in, i have two lil scratches on both of my hands..
 
really wanna go to bed but instead am having some nuts allergic reaction that is totally random. not been exposed to anything out of the ordinary.

done antihistames and inhaler and neither have had a noticeable effect.

fucking stressed cos of work shit and family shit i need to go to sleep.
 
If you can sleep, it means you ain't weak just a bit distracted, it nests in all of us. I know the feeling of your body being random, i fuckin know it not that i know it i fuckin know it you hear ahahaha, you can try to eat/drink some fruits, am more fan of drinkin fruits tbh, also try and drink carrots/lemons and also add some flowers not all because they aren't healthy but some are as for e.g (dandelions, lavender, hibiscus) i once made a salad with rose petals and some turkey at the oven, i didn't even need to add anything other than a basic of salt and pepper.


as for me man, my nose was laying down on coach today, i've eaten just a bit tired not necessary feeling the need to sleep as for rn but is there, i mean who isn't tired at this time of the year.. ate some butter biscuits with black tea, now i vent that is the only tea i can drink ahaha and that's 12/9 for me. I am going for a smoke and then proceed to watch what i've discovered overnight a semi mediocre show from netshit entitled ( epydemia to the lake) interesting enough, i have five more EP's to see.
 
chinup said:
really wanna go to bed but instead am having some nuts allergic reaction that is totally random. not been exposed to anything out of the ordinary.

done antihistames and inhaler and neither have had a noticeable effect.

fucking stressed cos of work shit and family shit i need to go to sleep.
Click to expand...
Shit hun, are you okay???
 
SunriseChampion said:
First of all, I would like to sincerely wish you all the best with your plans to clean up/get cleaned up in whatever form that may be for you and wish you all the best of health, physical and psychological. <3

I'm going full sober til my birthday in early March....except for tea....I'm never, ever, ever, etc giving up black tea.
Mainly I'm giving up drinking as I'm a serious binge drinker and it's doing my head in.
I've always taken periodic breaks since I started drinking back in.....2003? and do well with it. Abstinence isn't the problem for me; moderation is.

This time might be different though, depending on how things shape up. We've just entered at least a month of absolutely everything being shut down here. They're even rationing time on skating rinks for fuck's sake. I'm not sure how I'm going to cope with the social isolation.

This past spring, during our first lockdowns was the first time in my life that I started drinking alone.
Later in the summer, I started smoking again when I drank. The two eventually became entirely inseperable. Needless to say, I've now erased some of the health gains from quitting smoking in October 2019.

So now drinking isn't just binge drinking, it's binge smoking as well.

I don't have issues with the other drugs in the house (LSD, MDMA, and mushrooms) but have decided to not touch those either til at least my birthday weekend. Just to clear up the head completely (though, to be honest, any of those three would probably aid in that).

The mental clarity I get after I stop drinking usually takes three weeks to appear and it feels so good that I feel like is reason enough to take breaks.

I'm trying to figure out moderation though. Like fuck me, why can't I do it? I have no problem moderating use of any other drugs I do, including fucky ones like cocaine. But booze? Nope.

I also do drink too often for my tastes. Usually every weekend at least one day for up 3 months at a time. I would like to keep drinking to special occasions instead of this. Though, to be honest, football season is fucking hard. Pints go with football as well as smoking goes with drinking. :(
This won't be a problem though if I can manage to keep it to three pints instead of the usual match day shenanigans of a couple before the match, another 3-4 at the stadium, and then another 6-8 at the pub, etc.

Does anyone here have any experience with turning binge drinking into moderate drinking?
Click to expand...
Lots of people selling books on how good luck try Jack Canfield's Thirty Day Solution to try helping ya cut back

I also think psychedelics used in moderation have the power to transform and awaken and heal. I mean Jack Canfield uses them sporadically he said in a podcast.

I can see regular use far more beneficial than regular alcohol intake honestly.

All things in moderation I guess.

I leave you with this as my journey takes me deep into solitude. Psychedelics unlike non-psychedelic psychoactive drugs have the power to be used to enhance being without terrible side effects used right but fall into narcotic drugs beware of the insane circus ringleader who wants you to never leave their twisted show of ever increasing extremes
 
As soon as I woke up (around 3AM) I knew I'd had too much to drink. It was my first thought. When I drink, I wake up early. Today - thank God - I woke up before my hangover.

Last night I had 5 cans of Korudo Dry, which is a (very Japanese) Japanese beer and 2 long necks of Coopers Pale Ale (which is, perhaps, the only great mainstream Aussie beer). Cost me $35. I drank all of them in about three hours. 12.4 standard drinks. I bought the long necks in an attempt to limit my drinking. I drank them both as soon as I got home (and I smoked a joint) then drove - well over the limit - to get more beer. My efforts to moderate backfired.

At least I have a day off today. I'm drinking the last Korudo Dry now. I'm also smoking a joint. It's 4:20 in the morning. Hopefully, I don't spend the day with my head in the toilet.
 
Status
Not open for further replies.
Top