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Quitting high dose Kratom habit via taper

Scrillion

Bluelighter
Joined
Jan 8, 2017
Messages
215
Thanks for chiming in. I?m glad to hear you?re off the subs. Great job! Booze and Benzos scare the shit outta me. Booze just makes me feel terrible. I love Benzos though, and my Dr has been giving me 5 mg of Klonopin per week to use on the tough days when I drop my sub dose. I?m scared shitless of becoming physically dependent on those things. I?m spacing it out a good 4-6 days with the Klonopin. So far I think I?ve avoided dependency. Other than that I?m doing pretty well. Feeling excited to be done with the subs hopefully a few weeks or a month down the road. Worst part right now is just bad depression. I?m going to 12 step meetings every day and working the steps with my sponsor. Getting excersize daily. The mornings are tough. I feel really really crappy until about noon then slowly start feeling better throughout the day. By 8:00 or 9:00 at night I feel pretty much fine. Then I go to bed around midnight and the whole thing resets while I?m asleep and I wake up feeling like shit again. Fucking weird. Anyway, I?ve been to some really good aa meetings that have lifted my spirits quite a bit. Tonight was an exceptionally good meeting. See the Dr again on Thursday next week. I will be down to 3 mg/day by then. I can see the light at the end of the tunnel. Ready to wrap up this 10 month nightmare and start rebuilding my life, as I?ve lost almost everything at this point. Keep up the good work. I?d avoid the booze at all costs. Benzo withdrawal is fucking horrible too. Hope you can get totally free soon. Wishing you all the best. You?re so close!! I?m rooting for you!! I?ll keep updating.
 

Jshock1313

Greenlighter
Joined
May 19, 2017
Messages
20
Location
Louisville, KY
Sorry I've been out of touch guys! Still going kratom free! Been over a month now. I have some days where I get minor anxiety, but other than that I've been feeling great! It is possible, you can do this, and the freedom is as great as you're hoping it is! Worth every bit of the work! Stick to it! I've reconnected with my love for hiking, working out, playing basketball and much more. I'm having fun and a great time being sober! Some days the cravings for a high come in but they're easier to fight the more I say no. Learning to live life sober has been a challenge, but honestly, I love not being a slave to anything right now! I feel clean and empowered, as crazy as that sounds lol I'm cheering for all of you! You all have this! Keep pushing and the life reward will be well worth the temporary pain and discomfort! Hoping I can continue to live the rest of my life sober one day at a time!
 

Edbo

Greenlighter
Joined
May 3, 2017
Messages
5
I am new to kratom I have a little mang da white using a tablespoon chasing it with a B-12 energy shot I know it?s crazy but I?ve been taking the energy shots daily for the better part of a year and when I don?t have one in the morning I feel funky reallly can?t tell if the kratom is helping with my back pain? Will know when I?m out only taking it in mornings like every other day trying to taper both benzodiazepines and MS Contin and don?t want the kratom to get a hold on me addictions are hell. At 68 I?ve done away with alcohol swapped it for Pain meds 15 yrs ago
 
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hopesick

Greenlighter
Joined
Mar 24, 2018
Messages
5
When I came off heavy opioid use via pain management clinics for what was close to an eon, I used Kratom to taper off.

I never felt euphoric from it, just 90% less sick and 50% more pain free than my natural state.

If you're utilizing it for a similar reason, or to bridge between other opiates, you should feel at least some pain relief with it.
 

Scrillion

Bluelighter
Joined
Jan 8, 2017
Messages
215
Thanks so much for your inspirational post JShock!!! I loved it!! Congratulations on your success and freedom!! It?s truly amazing and makes me really excited for the future. I?m down to 2mg/day of Suboxone. Going to 1mg/day on Saturday. I?ll stay there until next Thursday and then I?m jumping off. I?m a little scared of the withdrawals, but I think I?ll be able to handle it. This is by far the closest I?ve been to being 100% clean (other than Lexapro, which I?m staying on) in 10 months. I can?t wait! Really excited to feel good and normal. Once I get there the monumental task of rebuilding my life will get into high gear. I?ve been laying low just doing lots of recovery stuff for the last few months. It?s been good and exactly what I needed. AA meetings every day, meeting with my sponsor and working the steps every week, staying in constant contact with my recovery buddies and hanging out with them and going to meetings with them, seeing the Dr weekly, getting excersize daily, and going to meditation classes a couple times a week. In addition to all that I?m trying very hard to live an honest, spiritual, principled life and trying to be helpful to others as much as I can. I still feel crappy from minor to medium withdrawals a lot of the time, but it?s been getting better and I know total freedom and feeling normal and naturally good again is so close. You all have been very helpful in this very very difficult journey and I appreciate all of you very much. Keep up the hard work everybody!! I?m rooting for you KraziKat, JShock, Edbo, TotBot and everyone else!!! I?ll continue to post and look forward to reading your posts. Thank you and best of luck!! We can do this!!! ????????
 

Scrillion

Bluelighter
Joined
Jan 8, 2017
Messages
215
Boom!!! Got my Suboxone down to 1 mg/day. Did that for 6 days. Today is day 1 NO SUBS, NO KRATOM, NO NOTHING!!!! Just Lexapro, 10mg/day. I feel so-so. I think withdrawals will hit me tomorrow, but I?m ready and I think it?ll be much easier than the cold turkey nightmares I was trying months ago. I went from 80 grams of Kratom a day to 16 mgs of Suboxone a day to 1 mg of Suboxone a day. Now I?m free!!!!!! Fuck!! That was the hardest thing I?ve ever done, meaning including the 8 months of repeated failures to kick Kratom on my own then finally getting help from my Sub Dr. I did the Sub taper in 8 weeks to the day. I?ll probably feel rough for the next week or two, but I can see the light at the end of the tunnel very brightly and am so unbelievably happy that my life is turning around. I had lost all hope at one point a few months ago. If you or anyone you know is struggling with opiate addiction/withdrawals please find a good Suboxone Dr. My Dr literally saved my life. And I?m finally totally clean!!!! I might cry from happiness right now. To all those struggling NEVER GIVE UP! I?ve been through it all and I?m living proof that addiction and/or physical dependency from opiates, Benzos, alcohol, phenibut, etc does not have to ruin your life. You CAN get clean but you most likely need good help from an understanding knowledgeable Dr to do it right. My Dr is in recovery so he understands my struggles very well. Never treated me like some criminal or addict trying to get drugs. I was honest with him and he gave me the care, meds, and respect that I needed...and deserve. You deserve all those things too. Get help! You CAN get better, no matter how low and fucked you may think you are. Please feel free to reach out here with questions, stories, information, etc. etc. The people on this forum helped me so much and I am forever grateful. I will continue to update and hope to hear from others. Here?s to freedom and sobriety!!! ????????????????
 

inittowinit

Greenlighter
Joined
Mar 4, 2018
Messages
6
Scrillion, WTG!!!!!!!!! I AM SO EXCITED FOR YOU!!!!!! How are you doing today? This confirms it... You can do anything! I'm so glad you're free!

Quick update. I'm still on the long taper path, but doing well. I've finally learned rushing this doesn't work. I'm down to 2.1gm 4 times a day now, from 3.0 5 times a day, so from 15/day to 8.8/day, and as long as I move slow and steady all is well.

Hope everyone is doing well!!
 

Scrillion

Bluelighter
Joined
Jan 8, 2017
Messages
215
Thanks inittowinit!!! And great job on your taper!! Keep it up!! I?m pulling for you big time!! Yes, slow and steady wins the race. Sounds like you?re doing it right. Good work!!!

I?m doing ok. Don?t feel great, but no where near as awful as when I was trying to cold turkey an 80 gram/day Kratom habit. Haha! The slight withdrawals I feel now are more than tolerable and manageable. I?m bustin ass in AA every day and doing all the healthy stuff I need to do. The worst is well behind me. I expect to feel off for a few weeks, but it?s nothing I can?t handle. It?s easy compared to what I was dealing with before.

Keep up the good work!!! You?re making great progress. Slow and steady is the way and you?re doing it!! You?ll be at the end soon!! Thanks for posting!
???????
 

Scrillion

Bluelighter
Joined
Jan 8, 2017
Messages
215
Ok, so slight set back. Jumping at 1 mg/day proved to be a little much for the Subs. Nothing too terrible but I felt like there was no reason to put my self through unessesary pain. So I saw my Dr last week and after having a good conversation with him and my parents about my tendency to be impatient and want to get things done ?right now, damnit? we all had a little chuckle and decided I?d taper further. So I?m going to do the 3/4 mg to 1/2 mg to 1/4 to 1/8 and then 1/8 every other day for a week or two then jump. At first I was so mad and frustrated but after having a talk with my Dr and my parents that turned very light hearted, yet serious, we becided I would best be served with the new plan. I am 100% done with putting myself through unnecessary pain. It?s been over 10 months of excruciating pain and suffering and I?m trying to live my life in a new way. One that involves respecting and loving myself to give myself the joy and freedom I deserve. After working through the first 4 steps with my sponsor snd talking with my therapist I?ve realized that I may have been subconsciously putting myself through pain and suffering because I thought I deserved it. Crazy, deep stuff I know. But I?m at the end of it all and any physical pain i should?ve feel will be very minimal and that?s makes me very happy. So I?ll be tapering these small amount for a bit and will keep posting. Thanks to everyone and here?s to loving ourselves and giving outmrsekves the time it takes to heal correctly. ?????????☀️
 

christian_1089

Greenlighter
Joined
May 1, 2018
Messages
1
Hey scrillion! I literally signed up for an account just now so I can comment your post. I am tapering off of kratom and withdrawing on a low dose as we speak, after multiple failed attempts cold turkey. Mind you, I have withdrew from heroin, Roxie?s, and suboxone but kratom? It?s extremely rough. At this point, it?s become a lifestyle habit in order for me to function, just as any other opiate. Ive fallen into a routine. All day, every 3 hours almost 2 years. I?m so sick and tired for having to rely on a chemical 24-7-365. This anger has led me to tackle the problem head on with motivation to kick the addiction and join local NA meetings. I?m happy for your progress and wish you well! Keep up the great work. Don?t feel bad for taking a step back. You must make sure you?re pacing yourself because this is it buddy! After this, say goodbye for this shit for good! ? You know what they say, sometimes you have to take a step back in order to take a step forward. You?re not alone. I?m an addict.
 

Scrillion

Bluelighter
Joined
Jan 8, 2017
Messages
215
Thanks for the post and encouragement Christian_1089. I?m feeling better about it. Like I said, I?ve been through enough pain to last 10 lifetimes in the last 10 months so I?m glad to do what I gotta do to make the rest of this as painless as possible. I?m fucking spent. I?m done with doing shit the hard and painful way. I?ve given up on fighting the drug/addiction and am ridding my life of it forever. NA/AA helps a ton. Good for you for getting your taper goin! Yeah, I?ve cold turkeyed and tapered and withdrawawn off of alcohol, Benzos, phenibut, Kratom, and even fucking antihistamines if you can believe that shit. And Kratom is a bitch!! Not necessarily as painful as alcohol or Benzos but for some reason it?s just as hard or even harder to get it done. It?s beyond me. I don?t know what that crap does to me to make it so difficult. However the short half life and variety of alkaloids in the stuff certainly contribute to the difficulty. But, whatever!! Fuck that shit. Suboxone has been a miracle worker for me. It still sounds crazy to me when I say I had to use Subs to get off Kratom, but I did and it worked well. I didn?t do it in 1 month like I originally hoped/planned, but 3-4 months ain?t bad and the fact that I can feel normal 99% of the time makes it all worth it. Thanks again and best of luck to you. I?m pulling for you and wish you the best, sobriety, health, and happiness. If you gotta do a quick sub taper to kick the Kratom, I say do it. I?m damn glad I did. I?m an addict too so I get what you?re going through. Stay strong friend! Keep up the NA too, I would suggest. Keep us posted on your progress. It helps us all a lot to hear others stories and struggles. Take care. You got this!!!
 

bu44l3s

Greenlighter
Joined
May 11, 2018
Messages
1
Hey all, i found this threat and thought i might share my experience with you guys.....

im a fairly big kratom user myself, around 40-50g a day and at the moment im trying to taper down. Everyone is different and i find that the first 24h after my last dose are very manageable, pain starts at around 30h mark. Some days im taking more time between doses wihtout any problem, my body seems to behave differently than yours for example scrillion, i think i could live with just a dose at night time and maybe one during the day, but my problem is my addict mentality, i could use way less and i know it but im always taking more than i plan. but now i wanna do this experiment for a week, today i will have a normal kratom day with 3-4 doses through out the day, but tomorrow i will try to wake up and wait until i feel bad then take a small dose of 6-8g (thats enough to keep WD away for me) and then just a regular dose before nighttime.

lets see if i can manage this for a week, im pretty sure that i have a really nice and healthy body, me and my body should be able to handle this. if i can keep this up and maybe reduce my dosing to just nighttime i will be really happy ;)

i did a little experiment yesterday, i took my last dose yesterday at 6pm and i felt ok for 15-16h, then i think i went into mild WD


ps: i tried to CT the habit a few times, but after 48h the WD are pretty shitty and i always started using again

it is amazing how everyone reacts diffently, i have a friend with the same habit as me and he can do cold turkey with minimal wd.

Its nice to share information and have people going through the same shit as one self.
 
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Scrillion

Bluelighter
Joined
Jan 8, 2017
Messages
215
The addict mind is a motherfucker to get a handle on. Best of luck to you. How long have you been using Kratom? It seems that the longer the time someone has been on it, the harder the withdrawals are. As far as dealing with the addictive mind, I?ve found that a recovery program such as AA or NA is the only way I can stay sober. I have to be super involved in the program; sponsor, steps, service work, helping others, daily meetings, all that good stuff. If you don?t like AA/NA there are other recovery groups like Refuge Recovery and Rational Recovery that many people have success with also. I hope you can find freedom and happiness. I?m rooting for you and genuinely want the best for you. Thanks so much for posting your experience and please keep us posted on things. Hearing others struggles, succcesses, etc is incredibly helpful to all of us. We help ourselves by helping each other. Much love and strength to you!!!!!??????????
 

JustferFun

Greenlighter
Joined
May 24, 2009
Messages
49
I'm in the middle of a kratom taper and I read through a lot of this thread. I started at 40 grams/ day and am currently at 25 grams/ day. I'm thinking about speeding up the process by adding agmatine and black seed oil. Anybody else here tapering? I imagine Scrillion is done by now. Do you have an update, Scrillion?
 

Catlady45

Bluelighter
Joined
Oct 10, 2018
Messages
29
Scrillion I hope you are doing ok. Been such a long time since anyone has heard from you!! Months ago I was googling for help and found your story and eventually joined this Bluelight! Most grateful!! ❤
 

Scrillion

Bluelighter
Joined
Jan 8, 2017
Messages
215
Hey guys, I posted the other day but for some reason it didn?t get up. I must have forgotten to hit the post button.

I?m doing well. Still on Suboxone and tapering Valium using the Ashton method. I feel pretty good most the time! If anybody out there needs to get off Benzos I highly recommend the Ashton method. You basically switch over to Valium because it has a super long half life and therefore your body has ample time to adjust to the decreases.

Im super involved in AA. I have a sponsor, a homegroup, and a service position. I?m working the steps and am currently doing my 9th step amends.

I?ve been working regularly and lots of good things are starting to happen for me. I attribute all of that and my feeling better from a good taper program....all of that is due to my work in AA, I believe. When I first got sober in 2010 I had the same experience. Once I took recovery very seriously, made it my top priority, and worked the steps to the best of my ability (which is far from perfect) my life started getting much much better. I pretty much consider myself an atheist, but I do believe that when you live your life a certain way, by a positive set of principles, and do your best to be helpful to as many people as possible, there is something in this universe that affects our lives. If you live positively, positive shit happens. It happened to me in 2010 and it?s hapoening now. Things are just falling into place and problems I had no idea how I was going to fix are more or less fixing themselves.

Anyways, for everyone struggling....don?t ever give up. But realize and accept that you have a problem and you can?t get better without help. There is no shame in asking for help. In fact it?s commendable. Most people don?t have the balls to admit to their problem and do the hard work it takes to treat it. It?s a disease. I highly recommend the documentary called ?Pleasure Unwoven?. Just trust me in this. It explains the brain injury and resulting series of malfunctions that cause mental addiction. Physical dependency is something totally different, but with the right taper plan you can get past that too. I?ve been through hell and back for decades. If I can get and stay sober, you can too. Just don?t ever let up or get complacent in your program of recovery. That?s the mistake I made that ended 4 years (the best 4 years of my 40 years on this planet) of sobriety and took everything from me. I vow to NEVER make that mistake again. Lesson learned, as usual, the hard way. This disease is not cureable, but it is absolutely treatable. I?ve seen people come into AA/NA with shrunken in faces, track marks all over their arms, failing livers, in horrible withdrawals, homeless, wearing rags, stinking to high hell, and not a penny to their name or a single person in their life. I?ve watched MANY of those people get healthy and turn their life completely around. Unrecognizable from the day they came to their first meeting, with 6 figure jobs, a million friends, starting families, and living the life of their dreams a year or two later. It?s truly amazing and incredibly inspiring to see. We need to do our best but always be kind to ourselves. We are not bad people, we are sick people trying to get better. Best of luck and much love to everyone. I?ll be sure to update more often. I?m happy to answer questions too as I?ve got a lot of experience with this disease. I don?t tell people what to do or that they have problems. I just share me experience and what has and hasn?t worked for me. Take care of yourself! Don?t give up, no matter what. If you relapse, just try again. Just get help though!! AA, NA, CA, Rational Recovery, and others are available and free! Just throw a dollar in the basket when you can. Love to all!!
 
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