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Social Tell a Joke

A drunk came home and banged on his own door one night for like 15 minutes.
The problem was he lived alone. So the neighbor went outside and told him he
wasn't there. And so he left !
 
Someone outside a mall was crying that they had lost 200 dollars.
This guy gave her 40 dollars from the 200 that he had just found.
He thought that when God blesses
you, you must bless others !
 
A bride starts to squirt uncontrollably during her wedding.
A priest gets sprayed in the eye.
 
There are two ways of arguing with a woman.
Neither of them work.
 
There’s a fly on my keyboard and I’m trying to kill him.
 
"How do you sleep at night knowing people don't like you?"

Someone: With the fan on.
 
Despicable Me Reaction GIF
 
HAVE YOU EVER LOOKED AT SOMEONE AND THOUGHT
SHUT THE HECK UP. AND THEY WERE'NT EVEN SPEAKING.
 
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Her: I bet he's thinking about other women.

Him: If she farts like that again I'm gonna press charges. :mad:
 
Two mysterious
people live in my house.
Somebody and Nobody.
Somebody did it and
Nobody knows who.
 
Hylite gtfo with dat gas.
I had something else I was gonna eat.
But I forget.
 
Why are threesomes only for sex why
can't I join in a couples argument if I want
to.
 
I'm so single right
now that I stood on a
cliff and shouted I love
you and my echo
replied I just want to
be friends ! :ROFLMAO:
 
I might show up once every 1 or 2 years like a bad venereal disease to let you know you're still alive.
 
I once told a chemistry joke, no reaction...

A neutrino walks into a bar, orders a drink and asks "how much", to which the bartender replies "for you, no charge".

Pi and i are having an argument, get real sais pi, be rational sais i...

What is green, has four legs and would kill you if it fell out of a tree and landed on you? A pool table...

Why did the blonde stare at the carton of orange juice? Because it said concentrate...
 
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